My Clockwork Muse by D.R. Erickson Page B

see from here that
Pluto got your other one. Whoop-de-doo."
    "You are jealous!"
    "Jealous," Tap scoffed. "You think the ladies
aren't all over this? Whaddya suppose I do out there all
night?"
    I shrugged my shoulders.
    "Oh, believe me, buddy, there's more to this
bird than just sitting around on sculpture squawking."
    "Can't you be happy for me, Tap?"
    "I can, but I'm not. Did you get a good look
at her old man? And you think your own stepfather was bad? All John
Allan did was deny you a few bucks in your youth, and you're still
having bad dreams about him. Now, this other guy, this Coppelius
... We’re talkin' nightmares here, Eddy."
    "It was not Coppelius who kissed me, Tap. It
was Olimpia!" Just saying her name sent shockwaves of excitement
through me.
    "Arrgh! Now I'm seein' that ugly vulture
planting a wet one on you. Thanks for the mental image, Eddy. You
wouldn't happen to have a gun anywhere around here, would you?"
    "I feel as light as a feather!"
    Tap shook his head. "Last night, you're
dancing with a corpse. Today, you're dancing on air. I don't get
you, Eddy."
    "Last night I was not in love."
    "Yeah, and last night you weren't wanted by
the police either. You'll be dancing at the end of a rope if you
don't watch out."
    My feet hit the floor with a thud. If mention
of John Allan had not brought me back to earth, mention of the
police did.
    "But certainly they don't suspect me. Not
really." My words sounded stupid in my ears, but I could not
believe it, not in the full light of day. And not with the feel of
Olimpia's kiss still on my cheek.
    "You heard what the old troll said. The
police think you're a firebug. They think you snuck into that
building when Gessler wasn't looking. They think you wanted to burn
the place to the ground."
    "Don't forget the woman in the lunchroom," I
said aloud, without necessarily meaning to. I looked up suddenly as
if my own voice had startled me from some reverie. "She saw me.
With the dead man. Before he was dead. Me , Tap."
    "She saw someone who looked like you. So
what? People see lots of stuff. You yourself saw Billy Burton
bricked up dead in a wall. And was it Burton?"
    "No. I mean, yes. I mean, I don't know. By
God, I don't know."
    "Well, there you go, then."
    I began to pace. "Oh, I don't know what to
believe anymore. I saw Burton dead. Then I saw him alive. Then I
saw him dead again, trying to kill me. I can't trust my own senses,
Tap. What I believe to be true cannot be."
    "Things used to be so much simpler before you
got all tangled up with the police, Eddy. Now look at you.
Melancholy and delirious half the time. Walking around in your
sleep. You don't know if you're comin' or goin'."
    "Coppelius was right about one thing," I
said. "I cannot tell the police what I've seen."
    "This Gessler fellow, the one who was here
yesterday ... A slippery eel, if you ask me. I'd be careful with
him, Eddy."
    At the mention of Burton's name, my stomach
always lurched. But Gessler's name produced in me a feeling of
defiance. "Oh, I am pitted against him now," I said boldly, feeling
the fire in my eyes. "Oh, yes. If I am to swing, it will not be by
his hand, believe me."
    "That's the spirit!" Tap cried.
    "Ah! But wait!" I had just remembered the
vial in my trousers pocket. I fished it out and produced it with a
flourish. "I may have lost my trowel, but look at this!"
    Tap leaned forward, seeming to squint.
"Laudan," he said. "What is it? An empty bottle that used to have
laudan in it? Or Laudan's empty bottle? Give me a clue here, Eddy.
What am I looking at?"
    " Laudanum , you stupid bird. Laudanum . An empty bottle that used to have laudanum in it."
    "Well, how was I supposed to know that? It
says 'Laudan'!"
    "Yes, I know what it says."
    I took it to my desk. I sat down and
inspected the glass vial closely, holding it to the light between
my thumb and forefinger. I turned it carefully.
    "I found it in that basement," I said as I
contemplated the glass and torn label. It was the first time I