My Stupid Girl by Aurora Smith

me. So,” her voice took
on a confident tone like she was wrapping it up nicely, “you’re like God. You
risked your life to save mine. That’s why I want to be like you! A lot of
people talk the talk, but I see you doing it."
    She kept her eyes locked on mine the whole
time she was talking. When she was done she reached up to pull the hair out of
my eyes. I quickly grabbed her long fingers but I didn't want to push her away,
which was usually my first reaction. Instead, I redirected her hand, placing
her palm on the hollow of my neck right near my collarbone. She raised her
eyebrows at me. She wanted a response.
    "I really have no idea what you’re
talking about." I reached out slowly and stroked her left check with my
thumb. She closed her eyes. She lifted her face up and when she opened her eyes
they were smoldering. No one had ever looked at me like that before. I had this
intense urge to touch her face again.
    Instantly a battle had begun in my head and
was now raging. I wanted to be close to this girl, I wanted her in my life. She
had already changed me so much. But here I was, with an opportunity to get even
closer to her, and I felt myself backing off. I was ready to get up and walk
out. Every muscle in my body was practically screaming for me to get away.
    Why?
    It was simple. I had lived with my father
controlling me for so long that, even when he wasn’t around, I still avoided
human affection from fear of some random, violent change of mood. Or maybe from
anger. Or maybe both.
    I had a choice to make in this moment. I
could let my dad win, or not.
    I forced my muscles to relax and do what I
longed for them to do. I raised my hand and put it on her right cheek; she
melted into it. I put my forehead against hers, still forcing myself to not be
afraid of this girl, whose breath I could suddenly feel on my face. She put her
free arm around me, we were impossibly close. She moved her head slightly to
the right. Her lips were against mine for less than a second before she jerked
back in surprise.
    "What are you kids doing up
here?!" an old man with a flashlight came up behind us, banging on the
iron railings and screaming like someone was trying to steal the whole stinking
lighthouse from under his nose.
    "Really, dude? REALLY?!" I yelled
at him and clenched my hands together at my side as I scrambled to my feet. I
had pure frustration seeping from every inch of my body. Lucy looked at me and
smiled.
    "I'm sorry sir, I thought we could
come up..." she was trying to explain but he cut her short.
    "You need to leave my property this
moment, or I am calling the police." He shined his light straight into my
eyes, completely blinding me. That dang light was so bright that it’d probably
be burning into my retinas in another minute, magnified by my glasses, which
were suddenly the worst thing ever. I started toward the broken door, just to
get the blinding laser of light off me, dragging Lucy behind me. The irate old
man followed, mumbling.
    "Dang kids, always climbing up here!
You know you could get killed up here!"
    Lucy was shaking from laughter as we raced
down the steps to my car.
    I, on the other hand, found nothing funny
about the situation. 
    Stupid old man.
    Stupid old lighthouse.
    Stupid girl!
     
     
     
     
     
    5. IN OVER MY HEAD
     
    Driving Lucy home was torture, pure and
unadulterated torture. Worst car ride of my life. Oh, and let’s not forget that
time where a bunch of Christians had stripped me and left me in a car to freeze
to death. Even that one did not compare to the ridiculousness of the one where
I drove Lucy home.
    She sat next to me, in the passenger’s seat,
with her feet up on my dashboard. Her head rested back against the seat, gazing
out at the dark scenery that sped by us. She looked as calm as could be. Her
hands drummed against her knees. I could feel her glance shift in my direction
every once in a while. If she caught me looking at her she’d smile. 
    "Could you put your feet