Night Edge by Jessica Hawkins Page B

happened around her.
    “What would you say to some exploring?” The man waved at her, bringing her back from her thoughts. “Let me take you around the city, buy you a drink at my favorite spot. New Orleans has a lot of secrets, ones only the locals know. I’ll show you how to forget tomorrow and enjoy the present.”
    Then again, existing in the moment could be overrated. Lola signaled for a waitress, shaking her head at the self-important pick-up line. “No, thanks.”
    “Are you taken?”
    “No.”
    “Then why not?”
    “I’m just not interested.” What she didn’t say was that even though she was alone, she didn’t feel single. A large chunk of her heart still belonged to Beau, and mere weeks wouldn’t change that. Lola took out her wallet.
    The man held up a hand. “I’ve got your bill. Go on and enjoy the rest of your night here.”
    “But—”
    “I insist.” He leaned over and took the receipt from her table. “If you want to thank me, pay it forward.”
    Lola wasn’t sure what to do other than leave the restaurant. She stopped at a corner market for a new pack of cigarettes, having finished the last one somewhere around the Missouri-Arkansas border. Once her trip ended, so would the bad habit she’d started up again. Cigarettes had become a form of comfort, reminding her of her early days at Hey Joe, when she was off drugs and alcohol completely. Smoking had kept her sane. Until Johnny had started to nag her about that too. Lola knocked the pack against her palm, walking along the Mississippi River.
    She eventually stopped and rested her elbows on a railing to watch the day fade over the river. She took a drag of the first cigarette from her last pack. She’d decided in the Ozark Mountains that it was time go home to Los Angeles. Tomorrow, she’d start the trip back. She didn’t want to be anywhere else.
    Ending the trip felt like closing the door on Beau for good, though. Letting go of her anger meant severing any remaining link to him. That was for the best, but the idea made her stomach turn and her eyes water. It was unexpectedly physical, the process of saying goodbye. Even her jaw tingled. It got stronger, prickling down her throat. Without warning, she gagged.
    Lola pulled the cigarette away from her face and looked it over. The river water rippled below her. She put a hand over her mouth, the ground suddenly unsteady, as if she were out at sea.
    She realized it wasn’t thinking of Beau that’d turned her cheeks warm and her palms clammy. But a cigarette hadn’t made her this nauseous since she’d sucked down her first one at fourteen. Lola stuck the butt between her lips and pulled out the pack to check for an expiration date. And then it hit her, the reason her mom had been forced to quit smoking twenty-nine years ago. Lola’s mouth fell open. The cigarette dropped onto the concrete, scattering ashes at her feet.
     

Chapter Twelve
    Four weeks earlier
     
    Lola removed her new diamond earrings and set them on the bathroom counter. She glanced up at her reflection. Beau was in the doorway, his bowtie hanging around his neck, a shadow of stubble on his jaw. He came up behind her and slid his arms around her waist. “When did you change?” he whispered. “I wanted to watch.”
    “I never let you watch.”
    “That doesn’t mean I don’t.”
    Lola’s heart skipped as he nuzzled her neck. The idea that he’d seen her undress without her permission made her flush. He was a dog—she knew that. He’d treated her like a dog. What made him think he could get away with that—standing just out of sight as she unzipped the long zippers of the dresses he’d bought her, unclipped the stockings of her wasted lingerie, unclasped her heavy, expensive necklaces. “You watched me?” she asked, her breath coming faster.
    “Mmm.” He moved her hair aside and kissed a spot under her ear. “No. But it’s been very tempting.”
    The thin silk of her robe did nothing to hide the fact