Oppressed by Kira Saito Page A

too many sweet pralines, and arguing with Antoine
made me extremely happy- but alas that wasn’t a really respectable
response. “I…”
    “ You?”
    I could see Maman carefully watching us
from the corner of the ballroom and anxiety washed over me.
“Playing the harp, Monsieur Edmond.” It was such a lie. I hated
playing the harp, but I was forced to take lessons because every
prospective placée knew how to play a musical instrument. It was
supposedly part of our charm.
    “ How charming.” He smiled
approvingly. “You must play for me sometime.”
    “ Yes. Nothing would please
me more than playing the harp for you.” Lie.
    “ Do you like the opera?”
he asked.
    “ Oui , Monsieur. New Orleans has the best
houses in the entire country.” Truth.
    He scoffed. “They’re nothing compared
to the houses of France.”
    “ Perhaps, but they are
unique in their own way.”
    He laughed. “Oh, sweet Cecile, your
innocence is endearing.”
    I felt like smacking him, but I kept
on smiling.
    “ How old are you?” he
asked.
    “ Seventeen, Monsieur.
You?”
    “ Twenty-four.”
    “ Do you enjoy
bird- watching?”
    “ I’ve never been,
Monsieur.” How boring.
    “ Hmm. I must take you
bird- watching sometime.”
    “ Nothing would please me
more, Monsieur.” Another lie.
    I smiled, fluttered my lashes
some more and prayed that the waltz would end
already , but
it didn’t. We spun around the dance floor for what felt like
eternity. Edmond kept asking me questions about myself and I felt
as if I were at an interview rather than a ball.
    I carefully scanned each answer
before I responded. I gave him generic happy answers. The type of answers
he wanted to hear. The type of answers a proper lady was supposed
to give. The type of answers that I knew would make him feel
comfortable. Every time I replied I sounded like a stiff imposter
rather than myself, and I wondered if I would have to spend the
rest of my life acting like a stiff imposter for the sake of
security.
    An icy wind swept through the ballroom and
sent shivers down my spine. “Run, Cecile! If you don’t follow the
path you’re meant to follow it will never end well, because you
won’t ever love him!” My body went rigid as I took in Bade’s words
but Edmond didn’t seem to notice my distress.
    “ You’re absolutely
stunning, Cecile. I find you quite charming as well.” He smiled
widely and flashed me a pair of pearly white teeth. “Would you do
the honor of joining me for a glass of champagne on the balcony?”
he asked as soon as the waltz ended.
    I wanted to say no and run, but
I caught sight of Maman smiling. She gave me an encouraging nod and
no suddenly came out as, “ Oui.”
    We sipped champagne on the balcony, where
Edmond spoke about France and his fondness for hunting, fencing,
and his family’s vast fortune. I listened, occasionally nodded and
asked him random questions to show that I was very interested while
in reality I was thinking about Congo Square and caramel
pralines.
    “ Have you ever been to
France?” he asked.
    “ Oui, I spent a summer studying in Paris.
It’s a wonderful city but it doesn’t compare to the magnificence of
New Orleans.” Truth.
    He smirked and his eyes widened as if I
had said something absolutely ridiculous. “This city is full of
thieves, savages, and the horribly unrefined. It’s an
abomination.”
    I wanted ask, then why are you
here? But
instead I said, “I’m sure you’ll find that despite its problems the
city has more spirit than anywhere else in the entire country. The
opera, the theatre, and Congo Square! The spirits are alive and
well; and the food, the glorious food! And it’s the only Southern
state where gens de couleur libres can own property…” I stopped speaking when
my eyes fell on his unimpressed expression.
    He laughed sarcastically. “Spirit? You
refer to human bondage, the inability to marry beyond one’s race,
and constant divisions ‘spirit’?”
    “ Every place