Philip and the Case of Mistaken Identity and Philip and the Baby (9781597051095) by John Paulits

And tomorrow go
to school. And don’t do anything that might upset your mother. I
mean it. Understand?”
    Philip said he understood.
    He went to school the rest of the week.
     
     

 
     
     
     
Five
    Philip was watching cartoons at Mrs.
Moriarty’s house on Saturday when Mrs. Moriarty answered her phone.
“Philip,” she called. “You can go home now. Little Becky’s
there.”
    Philip heard Mrs. Moriarty congratulate his
mother and say she’d be over later in the day. When she hung up the
phone and walked into the living room, she was surprised to see
Philip still watching the television.
    “Didn’t you hear me, Philip? The baby’s home.
Don’t you want to see what your new sister looks like?”
    His father had told him the baby would be
magic. Philip didn’t know whether he liked the kind of magic that
turned having fun into always having to be quiet. Magic that made
his parents forget about him and only think of the new baby. Magic
that made him and Emery the two unhappiest boys in the world.
    “Philip, you’ll hurt your mother’s feelings
if you don’t go see the baby. Look, here comes Emery. Maybe he’ll
go with you.”
    The doorbell rang, and Emery walked in,
holding a present under his arm. He looked at Philip.
    “My mother told me to give this to your new
baby.”
    “Why did you bring it here?” Mrs. Moriarty
wanted to know.
    “I knew Philip was here, and I didn’t want to
go all alone. I’m going to have another baby soon, you know.”
    “I know,” Mrs. Moriarty laughed. “You tell me
every time you see me. You make it sound like a monster is
coming.”
    “It is,” said Emery. “The attack of the
babies.”
    “Come on, Emery,” said Philip. And the two
little boys left.
    When the boys walked into Philip’s house,
Philip’s mother sat on the sofa and in her arms was a tiny bundle
wrapped in a blanket. Philip’s father was taking photos from every
angle.
    Philip’s mother smiled at Philip. “Come and
see,” she said.
    His mother looked awfully happy, Philip thought.
    Philip sat next to his mother and looked at
the bundle. He had never seen such a tiny person in his life! “Look
how small,” he couldn’t help saying to Emery. The baby’s head was
moving up and down and from side to side.
    “She’s inspecting the place, Philip,” his
father said, lowering his camera. “And she’s probably looking for
her brother.”
    “Look at her wiggling around, Emery,” said
Philip. The more he stared, the more amazed he felt.
    Little Becky made a noise.
    “Can she talk?” Philip asked.
    “That’s dumb,” said Emery. “That’s really
dumb. Babies can’t talk for at least a year after they’re born.
Even I know that. You think she’s superbaby or something?”
    Philip was about to tell Emery to shut up
when the baby made another noise and wiggled even more. Her mouth
opened, and it seemed as if she were trying to take a bite out of
the air. She did it over and over again.
    “What’s she doing?” Philip whispered.
    “She’s looking for something to eat,” Mrs.
Felton explained. “Watch.” She produced a bottle from her robe
pocket and put the nipple in the baby’s mouth. The baby immediately
stopped its wiggling and began to suck.
    “Do you want to hold her, Philip?” his mother
asked.
    “Hold her! Not me. Let’s go out and play,
Emery.”
    “Here,” said Emery, putting the present on
the sofa next to Mrs. Felton. “My mother said this is for the
baby.”
    Mrs. Felton thanked Emery and the boys headed
for the backyard. “Oh, and Philip,” she added, “play quietly. Becky
will be falling asleep soon.”
    Philip made a face his mother couldn’t see—a
face like he’d gotten a sour taste in his mouth.
    “See,” said Emery once they were outside.
“You’ll hear your mother say that a lot now. My mother says it to
me all the time.”
    Philip slumped onto the grass under the one
tree the Feltons had on their back lawn. “I hate having a baby in
the