Sacrifice Love: Saints Protection & Investigations by Maryann Jordan

that when I came back, I couldn’t stand the thought of seeing you two together all the time, so I guess that makes me just as selfish as you said you were. But, it wasn’t the only reason. The time back in Afghanistan was…different. I was close to death every time we got near an IED. But it also made me realize that I wanted a change. When one of the Special Forces team members found out I was in Virginia, he told me about a former SF who started his own security business when he got out. I planned on talking to Jack anyway, feeling that my life needed a change. You and Adam being married just made that decision easier.”
    This time the silence was more comfortable, as though they had slipped back into the same easy camaraderie as before. He squeezed her slightly to regain her attention. “That’s my story, Dani, but you’ve got more to tell me.”
    “Yeah, I guess I do.” She shifted out of his arms and stood, blushing. “I…um, I’ll be right back. I need to take a quick break.” She walked down the hall to the bathroom and took care of business. Needing to pee often was something she was getting used to again.
    Coming back into the room, she stopped in the kitchen, grabbing two water bottles. Walking into the living room, she handed one to Chad as she stepped around his long legs and settled back onto the sofa. Twisting off the cap, she took a sip.
    “We stayed married, as I said, because I think we were both too scared to actually admit we’d made a mistake. Adam was good company and I honestly believed that we might make something of our marriage. Friendship, companionship…it didn’t sound like a bad basis for us. We fell into a routine, like most couples, though. Work, household chores, yard work. You know, the mundane things that make up life. The problem was that without the love holding it all together, we fell into boring and you know Adam…he never did well with boring.”
    Shaking her head, she admitted, “I feel like such a fool though. I was the epitome of the wife is always the last to know.”
    “I had no idea Adam was cheating, Dani, until right at the end. He and I never talked anymore and I had moved to Charlestown. It wasn’t until about a couple of months before he was killed. I ran into an old ATF buddy when I was in D.C. interviewing for a case. Adam came up in casual conversation and the guy said Adam was back to his old tricks.”
    She looked away, pain slashing across her face again. It did not matter that it was old news…it still stung.
    “Sorry, babe,” he said, hating his words had caused her pain.
    Giving her head a little shake, she continued, “I told him that I needed him to be faithful. That I couldn’t stand the idea of him being with me after having been with someone else. I told him that he needed to make sure I wouldn’t catch anything.” Jumping off the sofa, she paced in front of the mantle. “Was that too much to ask? Was marriage to me so horrible that he couldn’t keep it in his pants? Jesus, how many people knew and laughed behind my back? Poor little Dani who can’t even keep her fucking husband happy so he has to go out and fuck his bar bimbos?”
    Chad jumped up, stalked over, stilling her pacing with his hands on her shoulders. “Dani, stop. Honey, you’re going to make yourself sick talking this way.”
    She looked up, her eyes filled with anguish. “What was wrong with me?” she whispered.
    “Nothing,” he promised. “Absolutely nothing.” Pulling her into his chest again, he held the back of her head with one hand while the other wrapped around her back. “The fault was entirely on Adam. I don’t know why…maybe it was his lack of a father figure. Maybe it was his lack of maturity. But baby, you were the best thing that ever happened to him.” He felt her shoulders droop and he continued. “Whatever it was that made him have a need to be sexually promiscuous, baby it had nothing to do with you.”
    “He hid it well,” she