Safe Passage by Kate Owen Page A

her laundry. I walked to a store about a block from campus, bought the stuff I needed and walked back carrying about four bags and a case of soda."
    "I'm not seeing the embarrassment."
    "Oh, wait for it, cher. I'm crossing the street back to campus and I realize something very serious. Becs was a few sizes bigger than I was and her shorts are falling off. I can't set my stuff down to fix the problem as I'm in a crosswalk that has already turned red. I'm trying to run to the other side of the street before the worst happens."
    Gen was trying and failing to contain her laughter behind her hand.
    Jules continued her story. "So, I made it about two thirds of the way through when the cargo shorts fall down around my ankles. All the cars waiting for me to get the hell out of the street, the heavy pedestrian traffic, the men's crew out for a run, and a large tour group of potential students and their families all got to see my Ninja Turtle underwear."
    Gen couldn't even pretend to contain her laughter anymore. "Ninja Turtles?"
    "They were a gag gift and, as I said earlier, laundry day had come and gone. But we're not to the worst part. In trying to get out of the street my own shorts tripped me up. I fell, head over tit into the road, dropped all the groceries, broke the eggs, sent sodas all over the street, and had a very unattractive road rash. I also ruined Becs' shorts and had to buy her a new pair. The capper, of course, was that for the remaining two and a half years, everyone called me Donatello."
    When Gen finally got her laughter under control she took a deep breath. "Why Donatello and not one of the other ones?"
    "Donatello was the nerdy one," Jules explained without missing a beat.
    "I thought athletes weren't supposed to be clumsy. Don't you have like super control over your body?"
    "There is a very good reason I compete in a sport that is done sitting down," Jules replied with mock seriousness. Then she fixed Gen with a predatory smile, her blue eyes darkening. "Okay, Genevieve, I showed you mine, now you show me yours."
    Genevieve shivered at the look in Jules eyes. But then the words sunk in and she shook her head. "No, no need to do that."
    "Fair is fair, Gen." Jules popped another piece of sushi in her mouth and sat back, waiting.
    "Okay. So, this happened when I was in Paris. A group of us decided to go down to the Riviera my first summer there. So we are picnicking along the shore and we stay there well into the night, drinking wine and enjoying the night. I got very, very drunk. There wasn't a convenient bathroom to where we were, but there was a very dense stand of trees that I decided I could use as the situation was dire from all the wine. So, while I'm in the trees, I feel something brush against my ankle. In my wine addled, Louisiana brain, I thought it had to be a water moccasin. I run out of the woods screaming like I'm being murdered and I'm actually holding my shorts because I was afraid I'd pee on them. But the thing around my leg won't go away, it stays wrapped there and I can't shake it off despite my doing some insane dance to try to shake it free."
    "What was it?"
    "My thong, it had gotten caught in my sock."
    Jules laughed for a solid minute. "And your friends?"
    "Were all French and didn't understand why I was running around naked from the waist down screaming my shoes were wet."
    "Wait, you didn't say snake?" Jules laugher was still escaping while she was trying to keep it in.
    Gen shook her head, and silent laughter made her shoulders shake. "No, I was very specific: moccasin d'eau. I thought I might need antivenin. They seemed to think I'd peed on my shoes and wanted to shake it off."
    "Oh, Gen, that's awesome."
    "Thanks."
    Their waiter returned. "Desert?"
    "I'm stuffed," Gen said.
    "Yeah, I am too, actually. We'll take the check."
    "It's on the owner tonight, Ms. Delacroix."
    Jules nodded, the muscle in her jaw tensing slightly. "Tell him thank you."
    "I will."
    Jules drained her water glass.