She's So Dead to Us by Kieran Scott

our house.”
    “I’ll see what I can do.”
    The side door opened before we could escape, and my mom walked in wearing her tennis whites. She’d been over at Chloe’s house playing against Mrs. Appleby. There was sweat on her chest below her diamond pendant, but her strawberry blond hair looked perfectly poofy as always.
    “Hello, Shannen . . . boys,” she sang, swinging her racket. “Jake.” Her eyes flicked toward the door. “Where are you going?”
    “Out,” I replied.
    “Have you done your homework?” she asked.
    “Yes,” I lied.
    “Jake.” She already seemed exasperated. “We made a deal at the beginning of the year, remember? If you want to go to Fordham like your father, you have to get your grades up.”
    “Mom,” I said through my teeth, “I swear.”
    “We’re just going out for ice cream, Mrs. Graydon,” Shannen piped up. “Everyone’s gonna be there.”
    I held back a smile. My mother was all about grades, but she was even more about looking like the cool mom in front of my friends, and Shannen knew it. It was totally lame, but I had used it to my advantage more than once.
    “All right, all right,” my mother said. Suddenly it was no big deal. “Have fun. There’s always tomorrow for homework.”
    “Thanks,” I said. “Let’s go.”
    “Ice cream! Sweet! I didn’t know we were going for ice cream!” Todd cheered, jumping up and down with his hands on Hammond’s shoulders.
    “Dude, take some Ritalin,” Hammond groused.
    We all laughed as we piled through the double doors. Shannen’s mother’s Land Rover was in the driveway, and Chloe waved at us from the backseat.
    “Nice work,” I said to Shannen, giving her a shove. “Way to play my mom.”
    “Oh, please. If I hadn’t done it, you would,” she said, shoving me back. “Here, you guys. Help me get this in the truck.”
    She bent at the waist and wrapped her arms around the legs of the lawn jockey that stood at the foot of the stairs. The twins clapped their hands in unison, rubbed them together, then crouched down without so much as a question.
    “Um, why?” I asked, crossing my arms over my chest.
    She rolled her eyes up at me. “You hate this thing, don’t you?”
    I did. It had been there when we moved in, and I’d always thought it was the ugliest thing ever, but my mother loved it. She thought it made us look wealthy or something. As if the eight-bedroom house with resort-style pool, full outdoor basketball court, completely stocked library, and gym didn’t cover that already.
    “Yeah,” I replied.
    “So help me get it in the car.”
    Hammond and I shrugged. The thing was way heavier than it looked, and it was a struggle for all five of us to lift it over the rear bumper and into the trunk. We laid it down on its side and it stared out at me, holding its lantern like an accusing finger.
    “Sorry, dude. I’m sure you’re going to a far better place,” I said. Shannen slammed the door and we got in the car.
    “Where’re we going?” I asked.
    “That’s for me and Chloe to know,” Shannen replied, her eyes sparkling.
    As always. Chloe, who was sitting on Hammond’s lap, sighed.
    “Wait. We’re not going for ice cream?” Trevor asked.
    Todd slapped him on the back of the head.
    “Where’s Faith?” I asked, glancing over my shoulder at Hammond.
    “She’s working with her vocal coach,” Chloe answered. “But she made me promise we’d take pictures.”
    “Pictures, huh? This is gonna be good ,” Trevor said.
    “You guys have no idea,” Shannen said, smiling at Chloe in the rearview.
    I pushed the button on the automatic window, letting the cool fall air whip my face. Shannen accelerated down the hill at Harvest Lane and hooked a left toward town.
    “Are we going to leave him in the park?” Hammond asked.
    “Nope.”
    Shannen zoomed past Van Houten Square at the center of the shopping area. A bunch of kids we knew were hanging around outside Jump, the local coffee place. They shot us