Society of Heroes with Indeterminate Talent by Sebastian H. Alive

fellow humans, and I find it deeply offensive."
    "I can't believe I was about to sell you this bad batch of Heroin laced with opioid painkiller Fentanyl.  I'm disgusted with myself.  Just look at what we're doing to society."
    "We need to change." said the buyer in earnest.
    "I'm going to get a real job and pay my taxes." sobbed the dealer.
    "I want a cuddle." cried Barry the burly body-guard opening out his arms.
    "Here take it.  I don’t want it." cried the dealer offering the package of Heroin to Agent Two.
    Agent Two stepped forward and took the drugs.
    "Take the money too!  Donate it to a charity." said the buyer thrusting out the battered briefcase which the agent took with his spare hand.
    "Group hug guys?" asked the dealer biting his bottom lip.  "Come on lets hug it out."
    The six men gathered together in a huddle with the arms around each other's shoulders as Agent Two and Captain Cognitive watched on.
    "Shall we leave them to it?" asked the superhero.  "I'm getting a little creeped out right about now."
    "Come on." said Agent Two.  "Our job here is done."
    "Do you want me to take the drugs to the evidence department?"
    "I think I'll hold onto it.  It's for the best."
     

10.
     
    S.H.I.T headquarters (The praise)
     
     
    “Agents, could you please step into my office?" said the cheerful voice from beyond the thick mahogany door.
    Agent One glanced across to Agent Two nervously with a puzzled look on his face.
    "He sounds almost pleasant today." he whispered.
    "Something's wrong, something's very wrong." muttered Agent Two.
    "This could be some kind of reverse psychology.  You go first."
    “No, you go first.”
    "But I'm confused by his happiness.  It's irrational."
    "There's a sub-plot developing, I can feel it." mused Agent Two tapping his chin thoughtfully.
    "It's like the happiness a Boa-constrictor feels before detaching its lower jaw and devouring the two young rabbits." murmured Agent One looking towards the door handle.
    "Come on!" growled the General.  "I can't keep this smile up for much longer."
    Agent Two swallowed hard and reached for the door handle and opened it before hesitantly moving into the office where the General was sat perched on the edge of his desk with a broad smile on his usually angry and contorted face.
    "How are my two favorite agents today?"
    "Is everything okay, sir?" asked Agent One standing to attention.
    "At ease agents, of course it is.  I'm a firm believer in some well deserved praise when its due, and judging by my latest reports you two agents have turned in some above average work for a change.  You did some good work out there boys, so keep it up."
    The General ran a finger over his moustache smoothing it down before holding out his arms.
    "Would you help me down?  I've been stuck up here for ages on this desk."
    Agent Two darted forward and gently lowered the General to the carpet who stood there with his hands planted on his hips eyeing them and still smiling.
    "There you go, sir."
    "Never be afraid to ask for help," remarked the General.  "I think my desk is about six inches too tall."
    "Why don’t you get a smaller desk, sir?" asked Agent One instantly regretting the words as they left his mouth.
    The smile faltered on the General's face, briefly returned for a fleeting second trying to reassert itself, and then it vanished completely.
    "Do you not think I'm ready for a full-sized desk like normal people?"
    "Erm…no, sir I just meant…"
    "Should I get a midget desk for pocket sized people?  Would that make you happy?" barked the General.
    "No, sir."
    "How about a little midget push-along scooter so I can get around my office quicker?"
    "I think the wheels would get caught in the carpet sir such is the depth of the piles and plushness of the finish."
    The General grunted and cast a look to the carpet and nodded his head.
    "It is delightfully luxurious, isn’t it?"
    "I may never see another carpet looking as good, sir."
    With his anger fading the