Sorority Girls With Guns by Cat Caruthers

of my brain that finds the guy really fucking annoying, but there's another part of my brain that finds him really fucking sexy. Well, maybe that isn't part of my brain, but still.
    "We had to cancel our float trip because it was too expensive." Charlie glares at Richard as if this is somehow his fault, which it technically is.
    "I had a girl get mad at me for not offering to buy her drink," Matt says, scratching his head. "There I was, talking to her and trying to actually listen to what she had to say, and all she wanted was my money. Said I wasn't being a gentleman!"
    I groan. "I know this is the backwards south and all, but I don't understand girls who think  guys should pay for everything in 2014."
    "Thank you!" Matt flashes me what I guess he thinks is a flirtacious grin. "Do you want to get some drinks later?"
    "No, I still find you repulsive. It just isn't because you don't want to buy me a drink." I turn my attention back to Richard, who's smiling like a cat with a yellow feather hanging out of his mouth. "Hey, don't look too happy. It's not over until we all fold, you know."
    "I didn't say anything." Richard picks up his menu and moves the smirk behind enemy lines. "Jesus Christ! $2.99 for a cafe mocha? And it's only buy one, get one half off? At those ripoff prices, they could at least do buy one, get one free."
    "That's really not bad," Charlie says, scrutinizing the menu. He nudges Tiffany. "Want some coffee? I'll buy you one."
    Tiffany wrinkles her nose at him like he just suggested she stop shaving her legs and wearing deodorant. "Oh, that's big of you. You're happy to buy me coffee when you're getting it half-off. So that's all I'm worth to you? A dollar-fifty?"
    " Of course not!" Charlie sighs. "Tiffany, how much money I'm willing to spend on you has nothing to do with what you're worth to me. Don't you get that?"
    She shrugs. “I get that if you really cared about me, you wouldn't care how much money it took to make me happy."
    "Oh, not this again." Matt groans and rubs his temple. "Anyone got an aspirin? This argument always gives me a headache."
    "Okay, fine. How much do you care about me?" Charlie demands.
    Tiffany looks at him like she looks at a pledge asking to borrow her best Louboutins . " What are you talking about?"
    Charlie shrugs and leans back in his booth, arms crossed over his chest. "Well, you haven't offered to buy me anything. Tell you what, why don't I buy our lunches and you buy me dinner at a restaurant of my choice." I think he threw in that last part because he wants her to pay for an expensive dinner at a five-star restaurant.
    Tiffany flings down her menu. “Are you kidding me? You want me to buy you dinner when you won’t even buy me a full-priced cup of coffee?”
    Charlie’s usually a pretty even-tempered guy, but it looks to me like Tiff is finally getting the best of him. He’s one of those people who get very quiet when you make them really mad, and he is very quiet right now. Without saying a word, he closes his menu and places it on the table next to his sloppy silverware bundle. Then he folds his arms across his chest, leans back in his chair and stares down Tiffany, who’s sitting across from him.
    “ Let’s get something straight,” he says, his voice low but loud enough to get the attention of everyone at the table. “You just said that if I cared about you , I wouldn’t care how much money it took to make you happy. The other day you said that if I cared about you I’d pay more for your dinner than mine. You obviously believe that there is a direct correlation between how much money I spend on you and how much I care about you.
    “ So, the same must be true of you, right? If you really care about me , you won’t care how much money you have to spend to make me happy, and you should be happy to pay for whatever dinner I want. It should work both ways, right?”
    Every now and then, the big brain has a good idea for Charlie!
    Tiffany sighs. “But we’re