Spell of the Screaming Jokers by R.L. Stine

Swim or Sink.
    Dad knocked and popped his head into the room. “You kids ready?” he asked. He stepped inside. Mom followed behind him.
    â€œIt’s time to Get Wet!” they cheered together.
    I cringed. I had to get out of this. I couldn’t let them discover my secret—that I couldn’t swim.
    â€œI can’t find my bathing suit,” I said.
    â€œNo problem, Tad,” Mom reassured me. “We just stopped at the Wet Set Boutique and I couldn’t resist these.”
    She handed me what had to be the ugliest pair of swimming trunks I’d ever seen. Even worse than the volcano suit I had shoved into the back of the dresser.
    Hmmmmm. Time for Plan B. If I could think of a Plan B.
    â€œMy stomach hurts!” I blurted. “Must have been something I ate.”
    Polly snorted. “You haven’t eaten yet,” she reminded me.
    â€œYou’re just hungry,” Mom reasoned.
    â€œSo quit fooling around and let’s go!” Dad said.
    I had no choice. It was Swim or Sink time.
    And I knew which I was going to do!
    On our way to the Atlantis pool, I spied that weird guy with the bucket again. As I passed him, he paused and picked up a piece of litter.
    â€œWatch out for the deep end,” he muttered. Then he scurried away.
    What does that mean? What am I supposed to bewatching for? I wondered. If he was playing some kind of game, it wasn’t funny!
    But I couldn’t think about him. I had bigger problems on my mind. In a few minutes, the fact that I couldn’t swim would be out in the open. My mom, my dad, and my obnoxious sister were going to witness my humiliating plunge to the bottom of the pool.
    But then something great happened! The lifeguards divided us into four groups: men, women, boys, and girls. My family would be down at the other end of the pool! I was so relieved I almost kissed Polly.
    Almost.
    â€œSee you, Squirt!” I told her cheerfully. I jogged over to join my group.
    Barry was our instructor. He blew a whistle and all the kids in my group jumped into the pool. Even me.
    Ugh! I hate getting wet.
    I clung to the side of the pool. I watched as the others splashed away from me. I figured I would do my usual trick of walking on the bottom and stroking my arms as if I were swimming. It always worked before!
    But not this time! As soon as I let go of the side of the pool, I realized we weren’t in the shallow end!I frantically stretched my legs, trying to touch bottom. It was no good. I was in way over my head.
    I thrashed my feet. I doggie-paddled. It was awful. Everyone was ahead of me and I kept swallowing the water they were kicking up.
    Then I realized I wasn’t alone. There were two other guys doing the doggie paddle too. We were the last in the group to make it to the other side.
    â€œYou three,” Barry called. “You’re in the Guppy class.”
    Oh, well. At least we didn’t sink.
    *  *  *
    The next day I sat between the two other Guppies. One of the guys was tall, even taller than me. The other kid was kind of chubby. He had on trunks exactly like mine. I guess his mom hit the gift shop too.
    I smiled at them. “I’m Tad,” I said.
    The tall kid grinned. “Let me guess. They call you Tadpole.”
    I nodded. “Yeah. That’s my stupid Club Lagoona name. What’s yours?”
    â€œEven worse.” He lowered his voice. “My name’s Neal. So they call me Eel.”
    â€œDon’t worry,” I reassured him. “I’ll stick to Neal.” I turned to the chubby kid. “How about you?”
    â€œMark,” he replied.
    â€œShark!” Neal and I guessed together.
    â€œYou got it,” Mark-the-Shark admitted. He sighed. “This place gives me the creeps.”
    â€œMe too,” I agreed. “Hey, has a weird little guy with a bucket—”
    But before I could finish Barry shouted, “Okay, Guppies, Let’s Get