Spider on My Tongue by T.M. Wright Page B

clothes are becoming loose.
    Perhaps I should get naked.
    I have always enjoyed it. Naked. Ennjoyyed it. Ran around naked as a child. Young child. Verry very youngg child. Two years. That's the time for nakedness. Two years. That's the best time for nakedness.
    ~ * ~
August eleven
     
    So many things in those other stories that were never told, and only because I didn't remember them or I didn't have the time to tell them, and I want so much to tell them here, but I don't have the time, of course (You can see that, can't you? You can feel that, can't you? That I don't have the time. I don't have the time.). This is like one very exquisitely long extended gasp I'm involved in, or a long and exquisite exhale—I can't tell the difference. Exhales, inhales, blue faces on blue tables.
    But I want to tell you much, all, if that were possible, but it isn't. I want to tell you about Phyllis's sister, whose name was Janice, and who was alive at the time (at the time Phyllis and I were together, always together), and she was hooked on me, though I wasn't hooked on her (though she was as lush and charming as a summer meadow) because I was so hooked on Phyllis, and she, Janice, would take me aside a lot and tell me I was having "crazy notions," because she'd heard me talking to no one she could see (Phyllis) and she was "awfully concerned" about me.
    So one day in the middle of her concern, she kissed me full and moist and ripe with herself, her good body, pushed hard against me, and I got an erection the size of a dirigible, and I tried like hell to chase it away (thought about Yogi Berra, thought about Richard Nixon, thought about rabbit stew, no luck getting rid of the dirigible-size, unwanted erection [which is an oxymoron, if you think about it, if you think about it—the body itself never doesn't want an erection; the body itself grants them and needs them; it's part of that hunger thing]). Oh, I am being so lucid in my hunger. I've read that's part of the process.
    This process.
    This need to tell my stories.
    And there she was, Janice, Phyllis's lush-and-charming-as-a-summer-meadow sister (older sister, two years) pressing her ripe body against me, and there's my unwanted erection pushing back, and then Phyllis appears in the doorway, and smiles, and cocks her beautiful head, and comes over and strokes my erection through my jeans, and I cum all over myself and Janice stops kissing me and looks at the cum mess in my pants, and she smiles (very like Phyllis's smile, a little open-mouthed, a horizontal vagina on the face) and she cocks her head, as Phyllis did, and Phyllis leans over and shows me herself beneath her green dress
    God, I'm exhausted!
    ~ * ~
August
     
    I am so embarrassed. That paragraph was like an orgasm. Can you forgive me?
    ~ * ~
August l9thhh
     
    I have never wanted to cum in anyone's face. It has been on my mind thatttt paraagraphh for days.
    I have eaten.
    I have eatnnn eggs.
    Cholesterol is a huge componnnentn of eggssg.
    The passingmiseryyrn is unconcnrned about cholesterol.
    I ned sleikp.
    ~ * ~
August 20the
     
    Awake andrested.
    All the tails that ned to be told:
    And so tolslepe.
    ~ * ~
August 20th
     
    She was not my entire journey. Phyllis was not my entire. journey.
    Mores.elp.
    ~ * ~
August 20
     
    More food.
    More eggs. I am not lucid withouttehm.
    More slep.
    ~ * ~
August 19
     
    Ten hours sleep while the passing misery watches and Phyllis strokes and Sam looks on merrily.
    I remember the streets at night in another place which was not Manhattan. In that small place which was not Manhattan. Afafterr I had gone from Manhattan, afater I had run from Manhattnean.
    It was Ithaca and its streets at night were serene. An occasional street lamp. Tall and turn of the century. No garish light. Only a soft light. Incandescent and yellow orange. A good soft yellow orange.
    People smoked beneath the streetlamps. I saw fedoras and zoot suits there, and dresses that hung to mid calf, under thoese toall lamps,