Gone to Her Grave (Rogue River Novella Book 2) by Melinda Leigh

compressing his chest and weakening his normal reserve.
    “You’re a good man, and I know you love my daughter, but love isn’t enough. Bill and I were married for a long time. Marriage involves a lot of give and take.”
    “I never saw you and Bill fight.”
    “We didn’t fight often, but we talked every day. We didn’t let issues fester.”
    “I think that ship has sailed halfway to India by now.” Seth dropped his face into his hands. “Besides, you were home. Carly and I both work. Depending on my shift, there were days we barely saw each other.”
    “I had four kids under the age of twelve. There were days I was barely awake when Bill got home.”
    “You left your career to raise your kids.” He regretted the words as they left his lips. He sounded petulant.
    “I did. That was my choice. I did it willingly, not because Bill made me. Never once in all the years we were married did Bill make me feel like his job was more important than what I did.”
    “But—” He almost said “it was” but stopped himself just in time. His gaze swept the homey Taylor house. This was what he’d wanted when he married Carly: a bunch of kids, some animals, home cooking, and a wife who was content to take care of it all. Instead he’d gotten a woman who was driven to improve everyone else’s life instead of theirs. “It isn’t that I think her job isn’t important.”
    “How could you?” Patsy said. “What could be more important than protecting children in need?”
    God, he hated when people pointed that out.
    “You’re a stubborn man, Seth, and a strong one. You want what you want.”
    “Did you ever regret giving up your career?” he asked.
    Patsy had been a promising folk singer when she’d chucked it all to settle down on the farm. “This isn’t about me. I couldn’t do what Carly does. I’m not strong enough. I couldn’t deal with seeing children suffer and not being able to fix everything. Can you imagine walking into a home with three hungry kids where the only food in the kitchen is a jar of mayonnaise? I couldn’t handle the shortcomings of the legal system or be satisfied with working within its boundaries. Nor would I have any patience for the reams of paperwork she sits up till midnight finishing or being reprimanded in court because a box was checked incorrectly on a form.” She waved a hand toward the back of the house. “Obviously I have to take everything in and rescue it.”
    Maybe Patsy was right. Maybe there was no resolving the differences between him and Carly. Maybe he wanted what she couldn’t give him.
    “I hate both of us working crazy hours, and it’s not like I can quit my job. We couldn’t live on her salary,” he snapped, anger eating away at his self-control.
    Patsy gave him that I’m-disappointed-in-you look that always made him feel about as tall as a toy soldier.
    “I understand that you’re frustrated. But you can’t say that you love her while you’re trying to change who she is. I think you need to ask yourself if you really love Carly or if you’ve cast her into a role that you love.”
    Seth lifted his heavy head. His entire body felt weighted down.
    “She doesn’t do it for the money,” Patsy said.
    Seth bit off the sarcastic obviously that wanted to roll off his lips. “I know.” Deep down, he did realize his wife was driven by a true need to help others.
    “Do you know that she has room in her heart for more than you and Brianna? It’s not a you-or-them situation.”
    Seth sighed. “But that’s how it feels when she leaves in the middle of the night because of some crisis.”
    “How is that different from you being called away off-hours?”
    “I don’t know. It just is.” And yes, he was aware his response sounded lame, archaic in a 1950s way.
    “Do you know what’s happening during one of those crises?”
    “She doesn’t like to talk about it with me, but I do.” He’d provided backup to social services in his patrol days.
    “When