Stay Well Soon by Penny Tangey

on my door as I’m putting the money in my top drawer.
    â€˜What?’ I say.
    Mum opens the door. Angel is standing beside her; she likes to follow Mum around. ‘Stevie, love,’ Mum says. ‘I found this in the bin.’ She’s holding the stupid blue bracelet.
    â€˜So?’ I say.
    â€˜So, why are you throwing away your good things?’
    â€˜I don’t want it.’
    â€˜But it’s lovely.’ She puts the bracelet on my bedside dresser. ‘I think it’s made of real stones.’
    â€˜I said I don’t want it!’ Angel turns and runs away down the corridor because she doesn’t like shouting.
    â€˜Stevie . . .’
    â€˜I don’t want it. Why can’t anybody understand that? I don’t want a stupid bracelet. I don’t want to be friends with stupid Morgan. I don’t want to go to the hospital. I. Just. Want. A. Pony. Is that too much to ask?’



5
    Beach Horse
    Because of when I shouted and then I couldn’t stop crying, I have to go to the hospital. It means I don’t have to go to school today, so that’s something.
    We have to wait for ages, but luckily I am good at waiting because of Rhys. I imagine that I am riding Atta Girl along the beach with an orange and pink sunset over the water. The wind whips through Atta Girl’s mane and my hair. I can almost smell the sea and hear her hooves on the sand. Atta Girl’s silver mane would start to glow gold as it catches the light of the last rays of the setting sun. There are some places in Mornington where you can ride horses along the beach. But it wouldn’t be the same if I wasn’t with Atta Girl.
    Finally, a lady comes out to get us. The lady has curly hair and looks a bit like Miss Ellis but I am supposed to call her Sandra. Mum waits outside while I go in to talk to Sandra. Her office is a small room with a big desk but she doesn’t sit at the desk, she sits on a chair in front of me.
    First, Sandra explains to me that she’s a counsellor and she helps people with their feelings. Sandra asks me lots of questions about school and Rhys being sick and Mum and Dad Ben and about how I feel. Then she asks me to do a drawing of my family. The crayons she gives me are not as good as my pencils, so it won’t be my best drawing. When I’m finished, she asks me to describe what I’ve drawn, even though it’s obvious because I have labelled all the people like she asked me to.
    She finally lets me go and then she asks Mum to come in to speak to her.
    Mum tells me to wait outside. They are as slow as a wet week. I can’t concentrate on reading my book because I know they are talking about me.
    Eventually, the door opens again and Sandra pokes her head out. ‘Would you like to come back in, Stevie?’ she says.
    The things they tell me are:
• Rhys has cancer in his blood. It is called acute lymphoblastic leukaemia. Sandra says it doesn’t matter if I can’t remember the name.
• Rhys will have to have chemotherapy to get rid of the cancer.
• In Rhys’s operation they put a tube in his chest so they can give him the chemotherapy drugs more easily.
• The chemotherapy might make Rhys feel very sick.
• Rhys is coming home next week but he’ll have to keep coming to the hospital for his treatment.
• It’s not my fault that Rhys has cancer.
• I can’t catch the cancer from Rhys.
• It’s okay for me to talk about how I’m feeling. It’s healthy to talk about your feelings. Leaving your feelings bottled up won’t work for long and that might be why I shouted and then couldn’t stop crying yesterday.
• Sandra wants me to keep a drawing journal about my feelings.
• I can ask any questions I want.
    â€˜Do you have any questions?’ asks Sandra.
    I don’t want to make Mum cry like with the make-a-wish thing. I look at Mum. She seems okay. ‘Is Rhys