Survivor by Lesley Pearse

come to this?’
     Belle asked with a break in her voice. ‘When she was born, we thought she
     would have everything we never had: love, security, a happy home in a place where
     nothing bad could ever happen. And now we are talking about sending her away from
     us.’
    ‘All parents tend to think they
     own their children,’ Etienne said, ‘but we don’t, we get them on
     lease. And when they become adults, they have to make their own way. In England she
     can find interesting and fulfilling work. Through Noah and Lisette she’ll meet
     decent young men, make friends with other girls, and the whole experience of seeing
     England will be an education in itself.’
    Belle knew he was right. But she was
     afraid for her daughter, going so far away.
    ‘What if she gets there and she
     hates it? Or she likes it so much that she never wants to come back?’
    ‘The first worry is easily
     rectified,’ Etienne said calmly. ‘As for the second, we both know girls
     usually end up where their husbands take them. We’ll never have a guarantee
     she’ll be living close to us for ever. I’d rather lose her to a good and
     happy life in England than see her marry the first man to ask her here, and watch
     her grow bitter and old before her time because she never experienced the love we
     have.’
    Belle snuggled into his shoulder.
     ‘You always present a good case,’ she sighed. ‘I’ll try to
     see it the way you do. So what do we do now?’
    ‘I will put a call through to Noah
     tomorrow,’ Etienne said.’But
     until we know if he is still willing to have her there, we won’t say anything
     to Mari.’
    Belle turned her face into her
     husband’s neck. There was nothing further to say. She knew Etienne felt as
     badly about losing his little girl as she did.



5
    Mariette was very aware that people
     thought she was cold because she didn’t show emotion. She felt indignant that
     just because she didn’t weep and wail, or say soppy things, they thought that
     meant she didn’t feel anything.
    The whole business with Sam had been the
     most hideous and hurtful thing she’d ever known. He’d not only made her
     feel dirty, ashamed and stupid, but her actions had made her parents and Mog feel
     horrified and let down. She so much wanted to find the words to tell them how bad
     she was feeling, how sorry she was that she’d hurt them, but she
     couldn’t. Keeping quiet and out of their way had been her only way of coping
     with the situation.
    Then, when she found out she
     wasn’t pregnant after all, she had thought that was the end of it, they could
     all forget it had ever happened. But just helping more at home, trying to show them
     all how much she valued them and how sorry she was, didn’t really make it go
     away. It was still there, like a faint bad smell that refused to leave, whatever she
     did.
    Outside the house, it was even worse.
     She sensed that everyone was talking about her; older people were snubbing her,
     younger ones looking at her with a sneer. One by one, all her friends dropped her;
     no one came round, and there were no invitations to go anywhere.
    Perhaps other girls in her position
     would have cried and made a scene, but that wasn’t her style. So she put her
     nose in the air and made out she didn’t care.
    When her father said that her godfather
     in England hadasked if she would like to
     visit him, her first reaction was utter joy. The thought of leaving behind the past
     humiliation and disapproval was enough on its own. And who wouldn’t want the
     adventure of going to London, and seeing all those amazing sights she’d seen
     in books and magazines? She loved the idea of being on a big ship for more than six
     weeks, and she felt excited at the prospect of getting a real job, meeting new
     people who would have a much broader view of life than those she knew here in
     Russell.
    But the delight and excitement soon
     vanished when she realized it was banishment, because