Sweetheart Deal by Linda Joffe Hull

lady had, unfortunately, disappeared before I could help contribute to her daily earnings. “First, if you can, make a little small talk in Spanish as a show of respect. Second, keep a positive attitude. Bargaining is a friendly game of skill and wit, and you’ll catch more bees and lower prices with honey. And lastly, don’t insult the merchandise unless there is truly a flaw for which you are asking a discount. It’s okay to say something’s too much, but you are better off addressing your lack of willingness to pay the asking price than discrediting the item itself.”
    In a manner uncharacteristic of our usual hectic schedule, Geo and the crew took their time setting up interesting and colorful spots for the remainder of our afternoon bargaining shoot. Like somewhat normal tourists, we took our time with on-camera bargaining, pointing out pitfalls.
    Frank was sent into a hat store with a roll of bills and instructed to say, “I only have two hundred pesos,” but pull a 500-peso note out of his wallet to highlight a big bargaining faux pas.
    The boys did a setup in a shop full of key chains, coffee mugs, blankets, and assorted local merchandise. They asked what they could get for a dollar, and I added a bit of color commentary while they transacted their deals.
    â€œThere are no fixed rules about where to start your initial low bid. The trick is to know what you are willing to pay and then try to make that price your mid-point between the initial asking price and your first offer.”
    Eloise had the best poker face and Frank the worst, so they were sent off together—Eloise to specifically act lukewarm over a leather bag she really wanted, and Frank to gush over a belt and buckle he just had to have for an upcoming Western-themed fundraiser we were scheduled to emcee together.
    I was enjoying both of their admirable acting jobs. Eloise examined the bag for quality before negotiating the price, and Frank balanced out his natural tendency to be impulsive by warming up the store owner with some friendly chitchat. In fact, I’d relaxed enough to set aside some of the tumult of the past twenty-four hours when Hair, Face, and Body chanced into the T-shirt shop beside the leather goods store where we were doing our shoot.
    â€œSo two-faced ,” Geo whispered from beside me, glancing over at them. “Or three-faced , I guess I should say.”
    â€œHow so?”
    â€œFor one thing, they act all happy when they’re really jealous and pissed.”
    â€œThat she got married?”
    â€œThat she’s a star, you’re a star, and they’re just extras,” he said. “In their sister’s wedding, no less.”
    While Frank and I were friendly with the bride and groom, I was well aware that our primary qualification as matron of honor and best man was that their gratis wedding was taking place on our reality show and thus needed to include us in key roles.
    â€œStasia asked me to be matron of honor, in part, so she wouldn’t have to pick one of them over the others and cause a rift.”
    â€œNo doubt,” he said. “You ready to wrap up this bargaining segment?”
    As I nodded and got into place, I forced myself to ignore the three sisters, who were huddled together and whispering once again.
    â€œWhere appropriate, venders expect and welcome negotiations,” I said. “When incorrectly approached, bargaining can not only be fruitless, but downright offensive.”
    Eloise, who’d been negotiating a price for her handbag, shook her head and began to walk out of the store.
    â€œDon’t be afraid to walk away if you cannot reach a price you are happy with,” I said, watching her go. “This is an expected move and vendors will often respond with a new offer, either now or the next time you stroll by. If not, you know that they have given you the final price and you can take it or leave it.”
    Before Eloise made