Tears by Francine Pascal

explore the intimate side of their relationship—keeping the world out because nothing mattered except their being together. Until now.
    He doesn’t want to be alone with me.
    Or maybe there was another reason. Gaia desperately wanted to believe there was some palatable explanation for why Sam would rather walk the streets than be alone with Gaia behind closed doors—some reason that didn’t produce a mental gag reflex.
But all she could come up with were pitiful joke theories.
Like maybe Sam needed fresh air after all that “studying” and “lab work” and “oversleeping.”
Sure.
    â€œLet’s go into Chinatown,” Sam suggested as they banked east toward Lafayette. “I haven’t been there in a long time.”
    Gaia searched Sam’s face. His eyes were glassy as marbles, unchanging. Vacant. His skin was so pale, it was almost translucent, the few freckles on his nose standing out as if they’d been made with a Sharpie. He kept looking over his shoulder, too. Why? Was he doing something wrong by walking the streets with his girlfriend?
    â€œWhat’s the matter with you?” Gaia found herself asking. She stopped in her tracks.
Her tolerance meter had reached its capacity.
The time had come to end this lame charade before they spent an afternoon walking in empty circles, going nowhere.
    â€œNothing. It’s. . . I’m sorry,” Sam murmured. “Please, Gaia, let’s just walk, okay?”
    â€œYou know what?” Gaia heard herself ask, as if she were listening to somebody else. “I don’t really want to hang out right now.”
    Sam searched her face. “What?”
    â€œI think I’d just rather walk by myself,” she said, walking faster.
    â€œBut we. . .” Sam didn’t finish.
    She lengthened her stride and pushed down Lafayette, banging past a huddle of German tourists, weaving through a band of Pokémon-backpacked children—leaving Sam behind. For a fleeting instant she honestly didn’t care if he caught up.
    â€œHey!” Sam shouted feebly behind her.
    â€œI’ll see you later!” she called, and her voice caught. She couldn’t handle the pain anymore. She broke into a jog, whipping past delis and shoe stores. Street signs blurred as misery rose up inside her. It felt good to run, to have adrenaline flowing through her, to feel icy air tear into her lungs. She would run and run and run—
    â€œStop!” Sam shouted.
    He was right behind her now. She tried to speed up, but he careened past her on Spring Street, throwing himself in front of her to break her stride. She knew she could sidestep him and keep going. She had plenty of physical steam left in her. But there seemed no point to that, either.
Because she’d outrun even her own motivation for running.
Where was she going? Nowhere. That was the whole point. She could get away from Sam, but she couldn’t outrun her problems.
    â€œGaia. Please listen.” Sam panted as he ran a hand through his hair. “I...need you to wait.”
    â€œFor what?” Gaia groaned.
    â€œFor...me.”The words came in a tired sigh.
    Gaia folded her arms across her chest. What did he think she’d been doing this whole time? For weeks? For
months.
Once again she couldn’t bring herself to look at him. She stared stone-faced past his head, over to a strip of sidewalk vendors attempting to push their phony Rolex watches and Prada bagsonto a flock of bland-looking tourists. Any idiot would know that the merchandise was fake. It was no secret.
But people bought the stuff, anyway, because they were a bunch of freaking posers.
Everybody was. Suddenly the whole world seemed pointless, just a place for pretense.
    â€œGive it up,” Gaia mumbled. Her throat constricted. Her rage melted away, overcome with an aching sadness. “Stop pretending you care when you don’t. Stop pretending to be someone you’re