The Art of Holding On and Letting Go by Kristin Lenz

and disentangled my gnarly hand. I made a funny grimace; what else could I do?
    Lunchtime came, and another note fell out of my locker.

    What the hell? I shoved the note in my pocket, grabbed my lunch, and slammed my locker door. The sun beckoned, and I was about to bypass the cafeteria and head home when Kaitlyn and Nick appeared, one on each side.
    â€œCalifornia Cara,” Nick said.
    â€œYou gonna sit with us again?” Kaitlyn asked.
    â€œUh … I was just—”
    My words fell away as I spotted Triple T up ahead, flanked by two girls. Their arms were linked with his.
    â€œCome on.” Kaitlyn and Nick steered me toward their group. The rest of the vampires had beaten us to the table by the window. That morning I had put on a black T-shirt, just in case. There was something appealing about melting into their somberness. But in this crowd, my blond ponytail stood out like a crescent moon in a midnight sky.
    â€œScooch over,” Kaitlyn said to Nick, who made room for her at the end of the table. The guy across from her had piercings in his eyebrow, nose, and lip. He looked at me sideways and moved over an inch. I squeezed onto the bench with one butt cheek, while he turned toward the girl on his other side. Fine by me. I gazed longingly out the window, then opened my lunch.
    More Oreos from Grandma. I had left the snack pack gift in my locker. My eyes drifted up the next aisle; he sat at the same table as yesterday, laughing with the two girls he’d been walking with. Maybe I just hadn’t noticed them yesterday. Why did I care? I didn’t even know his name. And Triple T sounded like a Kentucky Derby racehorse.
    I pulled the crust off my sandwich. Kaitlyn picked seeds out of her sandwich’s bread, keeping her hand without fingers mostly hidden in her long sleeve. I tried to peek at it, but I didn’t want her to notice. If I was embarrassed about my wrecked hands, how must she feel? The pierced-face guy kept bumping me with his elbow. I told myself to just stand up and go outside while I still had a chance for fresh air, but instead I watched Nick use four napkins to soak up the grease on his slice of pizza.
    â€œHe’s afraid of zits marring his perfect skin,” Kaitlyn said.
    â€œVery funny,” Nick muttered. His dimples flashed.
    He ate the pepperonis first, then devoured the rest of his pizza in three bites. The greasy napkins sat in a gray lump on the corner of the cafeteria tray.
    With his mouth half-full, he turned to me and said, “So what gives.” Chomp, chomp, gulp. “You moved here before school started, right? How come you haven’t been to the climbing gym yet?”
    How long are you going to make us wait?
    Pierced-face guy shifted, almost shoving me off the bench. A lightning bolt of anger flashed inside me. I yanked the folded note out of my pocket, shoving pierced-face in the process, and slapped it on the table in front of Nick.
    â€œIt’s none of your business. And stop leaving these notes in my locker.”
    â€œWhoa!” Nick held up his hands. “Don’t look at me.”
    Kaitlyn read the note aloud. “I don’t get it.”
    â€œIt’s about the climbing gym,” I said. “Planet Granite. Apparently
someone
thinks I should be going there. This is the fourth note.”
    â€œI didn’t write them,” Nick said.
    Yeah right.
I raised my eyebrows at him. Kaitlyn did the same.
    Nick looked back and forth from me to Kaitlyn. “Why would I do that?”
    â€œBecause you know I’m a climber,” I said. “How do you even know that?”
    â€œGo on, explain.” Kaitlyn nodded at him.
    â€œLook at her hands.” Nick reached across the table and grabbed my hand. “She’s either a climber or a car mechanic.”
    I snatched my hand back.
    â€œNick!” Kaitlyn said.
    â€œWhat? Okay, fine. I climb there sometimes. Everyone there knows you’re