The Hammer of Eden by Ken Follett

house.
    She sighed. “I don’t often lose it, you have to admit.”
    “Only when it’s really important.”
    “But now that I’ve told Kincaid I’m quitting, I guess I will.”
    “Now that you’ve cursed him like that, I guess you’ll have to.”
    Judy got up and poured more tea for both of them. She was still boiling with fury inside. “He’s such a damn fool.”
    “He must be, because he just lost a good agent.” Bo sipped his tea. “But you’re dumber—you lost a great job.”
    “I was offered a better one today.”
    “Where?”
    “Brooks Fielding, the law firm. I could earn three times my FBI salary.”
    “Keeping mobsters out of jail!” Bo said indignantly.
    “Everyone’s entitled to a vigorous defense.”
    “Why don’t you marry Don Riley and have babies? Grandchildren would give me something to do in retirement.”
    Judy winced. She had never told Bo the real story of her breakup with Don. The simple truth was that he had had an affair. Feeling guilty, he had confessed to Judy. It was only a brief fling with a colleague, and Judy had tried to forgive him, but her feelings for Don were not the same afterward. Never again did she feel the urge to make love to him. She had not felt drawn to anyone else, either. A switch had been thrown somewhere inside her, and her sex drive had closed down.
    Bo did not know any of this. He saw Don Riley as the perfect husband: handsome, intelligent, successful, and working in law enforcement.
    Judy said: “Don asked me to have a celebration dinner, but I think I’ll cancel.”
    “I guess I ought to know better than to tell you who to marry,” Bo said with a rueful grin. He stood up. “I’ve got to go. We have a raid going down tonight.”
    She did not like it when he worked at night. “Have you eaten?” she asked anxiously. “Shall I make you some eggs before you go?”
    “No, thanks, honey. I’ll get a sandwich later.” He pulled on a leather jacket and kissed her cheek. “I love you.”
    “Bye.”
    As the door slammed, the phone rang. It was Don. “I got us a table at Masa’s,” he said.
    Judy sighed. Masa’s was very swanky. “Don, I hate to let you down, but I’d rather not.”
    “Are you serious? I practically had to offer my sister’s body to the maître d’ to get a table at this short notice.”
    “I don’t feel like celebrating. Bad stuff happened at the officetoday.” She told him about Lestrange getting cancer and Kincaid giving her a dumb-ass assignment. “So I’m quitting the Bureau.”
    Don was shocked. “I don’t believe it! You
love
the FBI.”
    “I used to.”
    “This is terrible!”
    “Not so terrible. It’s time for me to make some money, anyway. I was a hotshot at law school, you know. I got better grades than a couple of people who are earning fortunes now.”
    “Sure, help a murderer beat the rap, write a book about it, make a million dollars … Is this
you?
Am I speaking to Judy Maddox? Hello?”
    “I don’t know, Don, but with all this on my mind, I’m not in the mood to go out on the town.”
    There was a pause. Judy knew that Don was resigning himself to the inevitable. After a moment he said: “Okay, but you have to make it up to me. Tomorrow?”
    Judy did not have the energy to fence with him anymore. “Sure,” she said.
    “Thanks.”
    She hung up.
    She turned on the TV and looked in the fridge, thinking about dinner. But she did not feel hungry. She took out a can of beer and opened it. She watched TV for three or four minutes before realizing the show was in Spanish. She decided she did not want the beer. She turned off the TV and poured the beer down the sink.
    She thought about going to Everton’s, the FBI agents’ favorite bar. She liked to hang out there, drinking beer and eating hamburgers and swapping war stories. But she was not sure she would be welcome now, especially if Kincaid was there. She was already beginning to feel like an outsider.
    She decided to write her résumé.