with what . . . fierceâyes, thatâs the wordâwith what fierce thirst for penance I have tried to mortify in myself the throbbing of the flesh, and make myself wholly transparent to the love of Jesus Crucified. . . . And yet, three women in my life have been three celestial messengers for me. Angela of Foligno, Margaret of Città di Castello (who revealed the end of my book to me when I had written only a third of it), and finally Clare of Montefalco. It was a reward from heaven that I, yes, I, should investigate her miracles and proclaim her sainthood to the crowds, before the Church moved. And you were there, William, and you could have helped me in that holy endeavor, and you would notââ
âBut the holy endeavor that you invited me to share was sending Bentivenga, Jacomo, and Giovannuccio to the stake,â William said softly.
âThey were besmirching her memory with their perversions. And you were an inquisitor!â
âAnd that was precisely when I asked to be relieved of that position. I did not like the business. Nor did I likeâI shall be frankâthe way you induced Bentivenga to confess his errors. You pretended you wished to enter his sect, if sect it was; you stole his secrets from him, and you had him arrested.â
âBut that is the way to proceed against the enemies of Christ! They were heretics, they were Pseudo Apostles, they reeked of the sulphur of Fra Dolcino!â
âThey were Clareâs friends.â
âNo, William, you must not cast even the hint of a shadow on Clareâs memory.â
âBut they were associated with her.â
âHe believed they were Spirituals, he had no suspicion. . . . Only on investigation was it clear that Bentivenga of Gubbio proclaimed himself an apostle, and he and Giovannuccio of Bevagna seduced nuns, saying that hell does not exist, that carnal desires can be satisfied without offending God, that the body of Christ (Lord, forgive me!) can be received after a man has lain with a nun, that the Magdalen found more favor in the Lordâs sight than the virgin Agnes, that what the vulgar call the Devil is God Himself, because the Devil is knowledge and God is by definition knowledge! And it was the blessed Clare, after hearing this talk, who had the vision in which God Himself told her they were wicked followers of the Spiritus Libertatis!â
âThey were Minorites whose minds were aflame with the same visions as Clareâs, and often the step between ecstatic vision and sinful frenzy is very brief,â William said.
Ubertino wrung his hands and his eyes were again veiled with tears. âDonât say that, William. How can you confound the moment of ecstatic love, which burns the viscera with the perfume of incense, and the disorder of the senses, which reeks of sulphur? Bentivenga urged others to touch a bodyâs naked limbs; he declared this was the only way to freedom from the dominion of the senses, homo nudus cum nuda iacebat, ânaked they lay together, man and woman. . . .ââ
âEt non commiscebantur ad invicem, but there was no conjunction.â
âLies! They were seeking pleasure, and they found it. If carnal stimulus was felt, they did not consider it a sin if, to satisfy it, man and woman lay together, and the one touched and kissed the other in every part, and naked belly was joined to naked belly!â
I confess that the way Ubertino stigmatized the vice of others did not inspire virtuous thoughts in me. My master must have realized I was agitated, and he interrupted the holy man.
âYours is an ardent spirit, Ubertino, both in love of God and in hatred of evil. What I meant is that there is little difference between the ardor of the seraphim and the ardor of Lucifer, because they are always born from an extreme igniting of the will.â
âOh, there is a difference, and I know it!â Ubertino said,
Learning to Kill: Stories