The Unidentified Redhead (1) by Alice Clayton

against the shower tiles…Oops, now she's glaring at me…she's turning off the shower, Jack…she's coming towards me…she's naked, Jack…and angry…she's naked and angry, Jack…you would probably love angry, naked Grace. It's something to see. She's hitting me, Jack…I think she's going to take the phone away from…”
    Silence.
    I stood over Holly, holding the phone in one hand and the other over her mouth.
    “You will be quiet, starting now,” I instructed in a low voice. She nodded her head, her eyes wide. She licked my hand in an attempt to throw me off. I had had enough.
    I could hear Jack laughing maniacally over the phone.
    “Hi, Jack. Things are under control here now. Can I call you back in a few minutes?” I asked, tightening my grip on Holly's mouth.
    “Are you really naked? Like, all kinds of naked?” he asked in between wheezes.
    “All kinds of naked. And wet. Now, that should be enough to tide you over for a few minutes. I'll call you right back.”
    “Jesus, wet? Wait, Sheridan, wait!” I heard him say as I hung up the phone.
    “Nice touch with the naked and wet,” Holly mumbled through my hand.
    “Yeah, I thought so, too,” I answered, hitting her in the face with my loofah.
    ***
    A little while later, with my armpit band-aid firmly in place, I sat on my bed in my robe, looking at my laptop. I had seen the pictures, several times. I looked sassy. I looked sexy.
    You looked gooood.
    I did look good. I dialed the phone.
    “I can't believe you hung up on me after giving me that kind of visual. You little cock tease,” he grumbled. His voice was low and thick.
    If I could hear Jack Hamilton say one word for the rest of my life, it would be cock.
    “I had an ass to kick. I saw the pictures; sorry about that,” I apologized.
    “Why are you apologizing? I should've warned you about that. That isn't the first time this has happened.”
    “Yeah, Holly mentioned that things were beginning to get a little crazy for you. You OK with that?” I asked, leaning back onto the pillows. I needed to get ready to go out, but I wanted to talk to him a little.
    “It's not too bad. I mean, meeting people who are fans of the stories is actually cool. It's weird though, because I'm boring. If they only knew how boring I actually am, they wouldn't be interested,” he sighed.
    “I don't think you're boring. I find you quite…stimulating in fact,” I answered, in a low voice.
    “Really? What exactly do you find stimulating?” he inquired.
    “Well, right now it's your voice. That damn accent is driving me crazy.” I breathed into the phone. This had gone from innocent to sexpot fast.
    “It's always the accent that drives you American women crazy. I'd no idea you fancied it, too…” he trailed off.
    “Oooh, fancied it. Say more like that,” I begged, smiling into the pillow.
    “Like what, Grace?”
    “Talk British to me,” I whispered, only half joking.
    “Dustbins.”
    “More,” I encouraged.
    “Crumpets.”
    “More!” I demanded.
    “Knickers.”
    If I could hear Jack Hamilton say a second word for the rest of my life, it would be knickers.
    “Say put another shrimp on the barbie!” I cried.
    “Grace, that's Australian,” he chided.
    “Say it!”
    “Fine. Put another shrimp on the barbie. Bloody hell,” he muttered.
    “Aaaahhhhhhh!” I screamed into the phone. Holly was passing by my room and rolled her eyes. I grinned at her.
    “Are you quite finished now?” he asked.
    “Oh, my yes. That was great. Thank you for that,” I giggled.
    “Anything for my unidentified redhead,” he replied.
    His unidentified redhead? Damn skippy.
    “So, what do you have planned for the evening?” I asked.
    “I'm going to a club opening, somewhere off Robertson,” he said, not sounding that excited about it.
    “Well, be careful. And you're not allowed to sleep with anyone from any reality show on MTV,” I warned.
    “Oh, laying claims now, are we?” he teased, making me realize what I had