Tortured Beginning by V. M. Holk Page A

wanting to erase the memory this brings up. But knowing Trevan needs to know.
    "Ben had a nickname for me, he even got a tattoo for it. He called me his Jay-Bird."
    I look outside, not wanting to look him in the face. Remembering the good of Ben, only made all the rest of this worse for me. And I hate see the look of pity on people's faces. I don't want their fucking pity. I start getting angry and when Trevan tries to hold my hand, I rip it from his grasp.
    "I'm sorry, Jaylah. I didn't want to upset you."
    "Whatever, you didn't. Thanks for stopping by and showing it to me."
    Trevan looks at me with an almost hurt look to his face. Again, whatever. I have to watch out for myself. Some how I have to get Ben to leave me the fuck alone. I will think of something.
    I get up from the table and take the mugs with me. I see Trevan watching me from the corner of my eye. I walk to the counter, putting the mugs in the bin of dirty ones. As I turn towards the front, I see him leaving. My heart sinks.
    "What was that all about?" Anne asks.
    I look over to her, not knowing that she had come up front. She is watching Trevan get in his car and looking back to me.
    "Nothing."
    I walk away, so she can't ask me anymore questions. Before I make it into the back, I turn back to Anne.
    "I'm leaving for the day, okay?"
    She looks at me with a worried look, "Sure."
    I walk to office, grab my things and out the back door. How the fuck did my life end up like this? My life has been a series of fucked-up-ness. I can't remember a time when I was truly happy, maybe high school. Before everything happened.

    I pull into my driveway, not really remembering the short drive home. I get out of the car, not paying attention to anything. I want to get in the house, take a shower and crawl into bed. So when I hear someone behind, I drop my purse.
    "Did you get my present?"
    I turn around, to see Ben walking towards me. I look around to see if anyone is outside and there is a couple across the street sitting on the porch. I relax a little, hoping that means he won't try anything.
    "Relax, Jay-Bird."
    I cringe to hear him call me that. What once use to make my heart melt, now makes me sick.
    "Don't call me that."
    He gets closer to me, putting his hand on my arm. I automatically, pull away from him.
    "Hey don't be like that. Can we please talk?"
    "Ben we have nothing to talk about. You aren't supposed to be around me. Why can't you leave me alone?"
    "I love you, that's why. We belong together, I realized that these past months. I can't live without you, Jay."
    "You have been living without me. You need to find yourself someone else. I've moved on and you need to, too."
    I see his eyes change, that pushed him over the edge. I look to see the couple still sitting there, watching the street. My mind is a total blank at what their names are and put my attention back to Ben.
    "What did you say to me?"
    He grabs my arm and squeezes it hard. I know that it will leave bruises, I try pulling it away.
    I wince, "Ben you're hurting me. Stop it." I hope that he snaps out of it.
    "Don't you dare tell me to stop." He moves his face closer to mine, tugging on my arm and squeezing harder. "I know you are fucking that cop. You are mine, Jay-Bird."
    "No I'm not, we aren't together anymore."
    I try again to pull his hand from me. I see that the couple is looking over at us. I see the guy get up and walk off the porch. He starts running across the street to us. Once he reaches my driveway, I can see the concern in his eyes.
    "Hey Jaylah, are you okay?"
    Ben holds on harder, turning to see him. "Mind your own fucking business."
    He quickly turns back to me and glares at me.
    "I was talking to Jaylah and I want to hear what she has to say."
    Ben turns around again and takes a step towards him. He still has a strong grip on me and pulls me with him.
    "I'm fine," I quickly answer, not wanting Ben to hurt anyone else. But I can tell that my neighbor doesn't believe and he stands his