Trust Me by Melanie Walker

baby, you can go to Candy, to me, any of the guys would take you in willingly. We’ve all always been you and Noah’s family.” He placed my hand in his and brushed a kiss across my knuckles, so soft it was like a caress. “Coming home with me would have some serious perks though.” He laughed and so did I.
    “Like what? Back rubs and breakfast in bed?” I asked jokingly.
    “Backrubs and breakfast in bed, huh? Yeah, I’d let you do those things for me.” He laughed turning my joke against me. I couldn’t help but play along. I loved playful Chad.
    “Oh, please. You sneeze and about fifty fangirls line up to give the consolatory ‘bless you.’ I’m sure a backrub and breakfast in bed would cause a riot.”
    He laughed and kissed my forehead. “The difference there Carrie girl, is that I don’t want them doing things for me.” He leaned in and nuzzled against my ear. He was still holding me across his lap cradling me so all I could do is squirm when his sweet breath fanned my neck. “It’s you I want, Carrie. You just need to realize that.” He whispered and sent chills down my arms. As if the seduction wasn’t enough he then placed his lips just beneath my ear against my neck and kissed me softly.
    On my neck.
    My newest set of worries?
    Why the hell hasn’t he kissed me on the lips? Sitting here with him all sweet and cuddly had my hormones in overdrive and I wanted a lot more than a kiss.
    Chad Blake wasn’t putting out!
     
    *
     

    I woke the next day well after noon. Alone. Almost immediately last night came back with foul clarity and all I could see was my big brother’s glassy eyes. I was going to have to talk to him and soon. I was not doing this again with him. I didn’t think I would ever get him back last time and somehow, by the grace of God, I did. I wasn’t about to lose him again.
    I knew why Noah used. I understood it. I knew what it was like trying to keep the darkness at bay so you could hold onto what little light there was. Our childhood had been a nightmare of the most sadistic nature. I knew how hard Noah had fought to keep me safe and how hard I had tried to protect him, but we had both failed in our attempts to save each other. I’d learned the hard way that there was no saving us and just accepted our fate. Noah was so much stronger than I was. Our entire lives he’d kept fighting for us, even when I could do nothing but curl up in a ball and cry about the shitty hand that life had dealt us..
    I couldn’t keep the memories at bay today; last night had twisted me into the terrified little girl I had been.
    I begged my father to just use me and leave Noah out of it. He had almost killed him the last time we played trust me and that had been years ago. I wasn’t even sure if the game was worth the suffering that our being caught brought that night. My father took me back to my bed and then forced me by the iron fist in my hair to ‘apologize’ to him using my child mouth and body. I gave in to his demands and did as he asked, all the while begging him to use me and not Noah.
    Begging became yet another pleasure of my father’s and he would use my love for Noah against me. His threats would range from beating him, to outright murder if I ever tried to stop him. I didn’t. I always allowed him entry to my body and allowed my mind to drift to games of trust me with Noah and the worlds I would create. I dreamed of the day those worlds would become a reality, dreaming of the day Noah and I would escape and be safe from our father.
    Though we never left the house again after that night we still played the game in the rare occasions that our father passed out early or was late coming home from work. The happiest times were when he was away on business doing something or other for The Joint. Noah and I would always create safe worlds where we were free of him, lost in the crowds on Pikes pier or the many winding roads in Seattle.
    The point was that they were just games. I knew