When Life Turned Purple by Eva Adar

You just chucked her aside and moved on to some other chick!”
    “No way, it wasn’t like that,” said Russ before Emma’s sister could continue. “I tried—I tried to work things out with Emma, but it just didn’t go. And I met Lia way after me and Emma had broken up.”
    “I never liked you, you ignorant little redneck!”
    He knew. “Listen, I tried to help Emma—”
    “Oh, how freakin’ noble of you!”
    Russ wondered what Emma’s note had said. Maybe there was still something he could do—
    But no. Russ shook his head from side to side as if trying to shake something off. It still hadn’t sunk in. Emma was dead. Her sister had just come back from the funeral. Everything was final. He couldn’t help her anymore. He’d failed. It was too late.
    Emma’s sister kept on screeching and cursing at him. Between all the abuse, he picked up phrases like “drove her car off a cliff” and “blood-alcohol level through the roof !” and what a jerk he was, not only for having left her, but for hooking up with Emma in the first place. But Russ didn’t say anything else in his defense nor did he hang up. He kept wondering if he had contacted her upon receiving her email, would he have been able to save her?
    But amid all Emma’s sister’s yelling and crying, the story came out. Emma had been found on Saturday—dead since Friday. The wedding had been Saturday afternoon. Emma must have timed the email to come after she’d already be gone.
    Finally, there was a sudden click and then silence.
    Lia sat there with her legs outstretched, holding her phone in her lap.
    Russ spread out his palms in a helpless gesture, then punched the mattress. “What could I have done, damn it?”
    Lia gave him a gentle smile and shook her head.
    “Emma’s sister always hated me. She looked down on me because I didn’t go to college and I own a gun. But still. I don’t know what else I could have done.”
    “I think both of you did whatever you knew to do,” said Lia. “And it just wasn’t enough. But you couldn’t have known.”
    “I couldn’t have stayed with Emma,” Russ said. “I mean, even without the abortion…how much longer would we have stayed together?” He chewed his lips while gazing at Lia, then said, “I can’t regret leaving Emma because….I have you. I like you more than I ever liked Emma, even during our good times. Even during those times when I really felt like I loved her. But it was never how I feel about you.”
    Lia leaned forward and put a hand on Russ’s arm. He felt a comforting warmth sink into his arm and flow through his veins. He opened his fist and put his hand over Lia’s.
    “I love you, too,” said Lia.
    Russ couldn’t believe he was talking about his ex-girlfriend with his new girl—with his new wife . He always paid a price for doing that before. The new girlfriend always started drilling him about the old girlfriend and the old relationship. And if he told her everything, she kept grilling him and comparing herself to the previous girl. But if he tried to deflect her, she got upset that he was trying to hide things from her. But Lia took it so well, he felt totally natural about it.
    “Do you think it’s my fault?” he said.
    Lia inhaled deeply before she answered. “Look,” she said, “Emma could have just typed in a search for ‘healing after abortion’ and found everything she needed—support, weekend retreats, therapy, empathy and validation, helpful advice. She could’ve done that easily. Thousands of women have. Why didn’t she? I don’t know. Did she not think to? Or did she think to, but just not do it in the end? I guess we’ll never know.”
    Russ nodded. Yeah, she could’ve done that.
    And so could you.
    Russ froze, his hand still over Lia’s. Yeah. He could have done that, too. Why did he think of therapy and medication and freakin’ sorority sisters, but not even think to do a simple search online for post-abortion support?
    He looked at Lia, his