White Oblivion by Amirah Bellamy

do and hearing what Connie just said confirmed it.  What she said awakened something in me.  Like a lightbulb just came on and shed light on everything.  I think it was the last thing she said when she said to look to our own ancient mythology for the answers.  Think about it.  She’s right, our mythology tells it all.  I’ve studied Kemetic mythology in depth and I do notice that all of the Neteru that are represented by animals are represented by predatory animals.  Take for instance, Heru who is represented as a hawk and Anubis who is represented as a jackal.  Then there’s Tehuti who is represented as an ibis and Sekhmet who is represented as a lion.  As you know there are many others, but one thing that you have to admit is that they are all represented as predatory animals,” Doran continued explaining.
    “Yeah but that doesn’t mean we’re predators.  That could just mean that they represented the need for each of us to overcome that part of ourselves, at least that’s how I see it,” I rebutted.    
    “I agree with that also, but in a different way.  I see it as our need to not allow our animal self to control our higher self.  Yet still I see it as a sign that we must still maintain our status as predators rather than prey.  We have to balance both lower and higher selves in the same way that the predator does.  It’s a unique balance which separates the predators of nature from the prey.  There is something very different about predatory animals that gives them an advantage and allows them to control the kingdom and that is that they are not weakened by emotions.  They kill only for their survival and for their need to feed, not for sport like their human parasitic counterparts.  Their moves are focused and strategic and have a divine purpose which operates within the universal laws,” Doran further explained.
    As he spoke I looked at him in awe.  I smiled up at him and thought to myself, “He is so damn sexy when he starts talking like this!”  I loved having those intellectual conversations with Doran.  It was what turned me on to him in the first place from the moment I met him.  He made me so proud to call him my man.
    “Then the other side of it is that for so long the black man has been told to tone down.  Everything has been done to carry out that end.  Yet, the very thing that is the source of our power as black men is what we’ve been told and conditioned to turn down.  We are fearless, we are strong, we stand firm on our principals, we lead, we live according to our own truth.  Meanwhile, from boys we are chastised for being this way.  All the while these are the traits of a predator not prey.  In fact, all things to the contrary are traits of prey.  Prey live in a perpetual state of fear, are preyed upon because of their weakness, follow so they don’t stand for anything and live according to the truth that they are fed,” Doran continued. 
    “Then, “he went on, “If you’re not a good boy who passively eats what he’s being fed you’re deemed another no-good black man, a punk or a trifling ass nigga.  So the result is the black man of today who follows the rules because he is afraid of losing his job, getting arrested or killed by the cops.  It’s the black man of today who follows the rules because he wants to keep his family together.  He follows these rules that are introduced to him as early as his toddler years that continue on into adulthood when he get’s a job and these rules even make their way into his home life.  Yet, these rules that he is being force-fed completely go against who he is as his own creator.  Meanwhile, our women and our children, all programmed and whatnot, are worshipping the others who wouldn’t dare follow these dumbass rules they’re force-feeding us.  And they look up to and honor these chumps as society’s heroes, who have virtually duped us into trading places with them telling us to turn down so they