Wolfie by Emma Barnes

*
    Outside it was now very dark. In the yellow glow of the streetlights on Acorn Avenue, Alex was playing football with Marcus. He had wanted to play in Marcus’s back garden,
but Mrs Mainwaring did not allow games: she would not have her lawn churned up into mud, or risk anyone smashing a football into one of her garden ornaments.
    Alex tried to slide the ball past Marcus, skidded, and landed in the slush. “Hah!” yelled Marcus, grabbing the ball.
    “Let’s go in now, Marcus,” said Alex wearily. “Mum’ll be wondering where I am.”
    “Call her on your mobile. I just want to show you this great technique I’ve developed for cutting off the angle —”
    Marcus stopped in mid-sentence. Lucie and Fang had just come out of Professor Pike’s house. Marcus hurled the football at Alex’s face, then ran over to hide behind the gatepost. As
Lucie came through the gate he jumped on her.
    “Hah!” he yelled.
    “Grrr!” said Fang, losing her temper She snapped at him, as she sometimes snapped at the gulls in the park, only less playfully. Marcus sat down with a thump in the snow.
    “Gerr’er off me!” he squawked.
    “Don’t be silly,” said Lucie coldly. “Fang won’t bite you.”
    “Although you deserve it,” said Alex, coming up. “Snooping!”
    “I wasn’t snooping!” Marcus struggled up out of the wet slush. “I was playing football and when I saw Lucie, I — well, I was concerned that she might be bothering
Professor Pike. After all, Professor Pike is very — err — elderly.”
    “Snooping!” said Alex again.
    “Anyway what were you doing in there?” Marcus said to Lucie. “What do you want with that old Professor?”
    “You don’t have to tell him,” said Alex.
    “I know. But actually I don’t mind.”
    Lucie reached into her coat pocket and drew out an envelope. Very slowly she unfolded it. “Listen:
    “To Whom It May Concern
    I, Professor Elspeth Pike, Professor Emeritus of Zoology, Fellow of the World Centre of Canid Studies, Winner of the Gold Medal for Contribution to Scientific Understanding
     given by the International Distinguished Scientists’ Society, and acknowledged expert on the species Canis Lupus (Wolves) do hereby certify that the animal belonging to Lucie Firkettle,
     commonly known as “Wolfie”, does not meet those accepted criteria established by experts in the field and so cannot be categorised as a member of the Canis Lupus (Wolf) species.
    Yours sincerely
    Professor Elspeth Pike, FRS, FSCS, WERE, Er., Ser, WERWE, Phd.
    There was a brief silence.
    “What does
that
mean?” demanded Marcus rudely. “It’s gibberish!”
    “Don’t worry about what it means,” said Lucie, smiling as she folded up the letter. “It’s called an Expert Opinion. And the important thing is — Professor
Pike says it will do the trick!”
    “Here, give me that!” And Marcus tried to snatch the letter. But Alex grabbed his jacket, and Marcus slipped and fell in the slush for the second time.
    “Serves you right!” said Alex.
    But Marcus was already up and running for home. It wasn’t Alex that had scared him. It was the look he had seen in Fang’s eyes. Certified or uncertified wolf, he wasn’t going
to mess with her!

CHAPTER EIGHTEEN
As It Turned Out
    A s soon as she got home Lucie showed Professor Pike’s letter to her parents. They were both still looking terribly worried and guilty, but as
they read the letter all that changed. The worry drained from their faces, the anxious lines on their foreheads vanished and by the time they had finished reading they were almost chuckling.
    “Oh well, that’s all right then,” said Dad. “A wolf indeed!”
    “We were crazy!” agreed Mum. “Imbeciles! I mean a wolf — in our house!”
    “Professor Pike knows her onions,” said Dad. “Or wolves, I should say. If only we’d known she was a World Expert on Canines! We could have sorted this out long
ago.”
    “I’ll telephone the vet and cancel that