You Know You Love Me by Cecily von Ziegesar

come up with a plan, but the only plan he could think of was to wait
     and see what happened when he saw Blair on Friday night. There was no point in getting all
     worked up about it now. Just then the door to the computer lab opened, and Jeremy Scott
     Tompkinson poked his head around the door. Yo, Nathaniel, were cutting Gym. Come to the
     park with us and play some ball. The second bell rang. Nate was late for Gym anyway, and
     after Gym he had lunch. Cutting sounded like an excellent idea. Yeah, sure, Nate said.
     Hold on a sec. He clicked on Blairs e-mail and dragged it across the screen and into the
     trash. Okay, he said, standing up. Lets go. Hmmm, if he really loved her, he probably
     wouldve saved the e- mail, or at least answered it, right?
    It was a sunny October day in Central Park. Out in Sheep Meadow lots of kids were cutting
     school, just lying in the grass, smoking, or playing Frisbee. The trees surrounding the
     meadow were a blaze of yellows, oranges, and reds, and beyond the trees loomed the
     beautiful old apartment buildings on Central Park West. A guy was selling weed, and
     Anthony Avuldsen bought some to add to what Nate had picked up at the pizza place
     yesterday at lunch. Nate, Jeremy, Anthony, and Charlie Dern passed an enormous joint
     between them as they dribbled a soccer ball around on the grass.
    Charlie puffed on the joint and passed it to Jeremy. Nate shot him the ball and Charlie
     tripped over it. He was six feet tall, and his head was too big for his body. People
     called him Frankenstein. Ever the blond athletic one, even when he was stoned, Anthony
     dove for the ball, kicked it up in the air and headed it at Jeremy. It hit Jeremy in his
     puny chest and he let it roll to the ground, dribbling it between his feet.
    Shit, this stuff is strong, Jeremy said, hitching up his pants. They were always sliding
     down below his skinny hips, no matter how tightly he buckled his belt. Yeah, it is, Nate
     agreed. Im all fucked up. His feet were itchy. It felt like the grass was growing through
     the rubber soles of his sneakers.
    Jeremy stopped dribbling the ball. Hey, Nate. Have you seen Serena van der Woodsen yet? he
     asked. I heard shes back. Nate looked at the ball longingly, wishing he had it so he could
     dribble it away across the field and pretend he hadnt heard Jeremys question. He could
     feel the other three boys staring at him. He bent down and pulled his left shoe off so he
     could scratch the bottom of his foot. Damn, it itched. Yeah, I saw her Monday, he said
     casually, hopping up and down on one foot.
    Charlie cleared his throat and spit in the grass. Whatd she look like? he asked. I heard
     she got into all sorts of trouble up at Hanover. Me too, Anthony said, sucking on the
     roach. I heard she got kicked out for having sex with this whole group of guys in her
     room. Her roommate ratted her out. He laughed. Like, couldnt she afford a hotel room?
    Charlie laughed. I heard she has a kid. Im serious. She had it in France and left it
     there. Her parents are paying to have it raised in some fancy French convent. Its like a
     fucking movie, man. Nate couldnt believe what he was hearing. He dropped his shoe and sat
     down in the grass. Then he took off his other shoe and pulled off both of his socks. He
     didnt say anything, he just sat there, scratching his bare feet.
    Can you imagine Serena with all these guys in her dorm room? Like, Ooh, baby. Harder,
     harder! Jeremy fell down on the grass, rubbing his skinny belly and cackling hysterically.
     Oh, man! Wonder if she even knows who the daddy is, Anthony said.
    I heard there was a pretty major drug thing going on, too, Charlie said. She was dealing
     and got addicted to whatever it was. She was in rehab in Switzerland all summer. After the
     baby was born, I guess.
    Whoa, that is fucked up, Jeremy said.
    You and her had a thing, didnt you, Nate? Charlie said. Whered you hear that? Nate asked,