Your Bed or Mine? by Candy Halliday

Zada said, “Be careful, Alicia, I can go from zero to bitch as fast as you can.”
    Alicia smiled again.
    Hiss-like this time.
    “I don’t doubt that for a minute,” Alicia said.
    Zada said, “So, what’s it going to be, Alicia? Are you willing to back off, or aren’t you?”
    Alicia said, “I could be persuaded to back off.
If
you’ll tell me the truth about something else.”
    “Name it,” Zada said.
    “Tell me what really goes on at your Housewives’ Fantasy Club meetings.”
    What?
    Zada laughed.
    It had all started over a silly conversation they were having with the guys about why men couldn’t just tell the truth about
     whether or not a woman’s butt looked fat in whatever she was wearing.
    “You can’t
handle
the truth,” Rick had joked, doing his best Jack Nicholson imitation from
A Few Good Men.
    “I agree,” Zada had said, laughing. “Forget the truth. Give me a fairy godmother!”
    After that, the guys had started calling them the Housewives’ Fantasy Club, teasing them that
only
a fairy godmother could ever make their butts look skinny enough to suit them. Zada, Jen, and Tish had laughed themselves
     silly over the outrageous rumors that quickly spread through Woodberry Park after the nickname got out—everyone putting their
     own twist on the true meaning behind why they were called the Housewives’ Fantasy Club.
    But Zada wasn’t going to admit that.
    Not to Alicia any-time-day-or-night Greene!
    “Well?” Alicia said.
    “What do you think goes on, Alicia?” Zada asked.
    The catty smile was back.
    “What do I think personally?” Alicia asked.
    Zada nodded.
    “Nothing,” Alicia said smugly. “Absolutely nothing.”
    Busted. Again.
    “You’re wrong,” Zada lied.
    Alicia tossed her shimmering (
naturally
blond, dammit) hair over one tanned shoulder. “Then the rumors about the three of you sharing your sexual fantasies are true?”
    Zada only nodded. The foot in her mouth wouldn’t let her speak.
    Alicia said, “Invite me to your meeting tonight and prove it.”
    Life’s a bitch.
    Then it has puppies!
    “I can’t do that,” Zada said.
    Alicia looked pointedly at Zada’s house.
    Zada frowned.
    “No invitation,” Alicia said, “no backing off.”
    Zada was tempted to give in, but only for a second.
    Invite Alicia so she can expose us as frauds?
    Not one of my fairy godmother wishes!
    “Maybe you’re right,” Zada lied. “I should be glad you’re in the mood to take Rick off my hands. Go for it, Alicia. You’ll
     be saving me a lot of trouble.”
    Zada whirled around and started down the steps.
    “You make a lousy liar, Zada,” Alicia called after her.
    Frack!
    Zada didn’t even bother calling out an answer. Fists clenched, she stomped back across the street. And she cursed desperation
     with every step she took.
    Unleashing Alicia on Rick was just plain stupid!
    Alicia waited until Zada was out of sight before she went inside the house. The second she closed the door behind her, Alicia
     did a wild Snoopy dance all around her foyer. Her dancing came to a screeching halt when she looked up and saw her cleaning
     lady, who was standing at the top of the stairway, staring at her as if Alicia had suddenly gone mad.
    “Is there a problem, Roberta?”
    Roberta shook her head, then went about her business.
    To hell with Roberta!
    Let the woman think she was crazy. Alicia was too excited to care. She wasn’t interested in Rick Clark. Never had been. Rick
     had only been the means to an end. The end of her being treated like the piranha of Woodberry Park.
    Alicia smiled to herself.
    All she had to do now was make Zada
think
she was pursuing Rick. Within the week, she’d have that invitation. Most likely served up on a freaking silver platter!
    And what a relief not having to throw herself at Rick. Rick had been cordial enough to her, sure, but Alicia knew he wasn’t
     interested.
    Alicia laughed out loud.
    It was the first time in her life another woman seeing her