You've Got Tail by Renee George Page A

hon, but you will never be one of us.”
    That hurt. I’d come to expect the rest of Peculiar to try to drive me out of town. But I hadn’t thought Ruth would break out a torch and pitchfork. The rest of the ride home was in total awkward silence.
    Ruth dropped me off at the diner, and I was beginning to think maybe we couldn’t be friends so much. Especially if she was going to keep joining in the rousing chorus of “get the hell out of town.”
    When Sheriff Taylor pulled up in his Crown Vic, I wasn’t really surprised. The bell dinged on the door as he walked in. I smiled to myself. I’d bought the bell at one of those country-chic stores and the noise confirmed I’d managed to put it up right.
    â€œNice,” he said.
    â€œSo, how are you planning on running me out of town today?”
    His mouth quirked up in one corner. “You’re a funny gal.”
    â€œMost gals are, don’t you know?”
    â€œSeriously though, Ms. Haddock.”
    Who wasn’t being serious? I certainly was. Jumbo-sized serious. “What now?” I whined.
    â€œThere’s a big storm coming in tonight. Talk of tornadoes and such. They can come on mighty quickly and without warning. So best to stay in and lock your doors and windows.”
    â€œHuh?”
    â€œYou know.” He whistled and twirled his finger around in the air. “Tornadoes.”
    Tornadoes? I’d heard of tornadoes in the Midwest, but hadn’t given them a second thought when I’d moved out here. But I was a Cali girl. I’d suffered tremors and the threat of earthquakes. Surely I could take on big, swirling, monstrous funnel clouds of death.
    Oh my God! What was I thinking?
    Funnel clouds of death.
    Great. Like there wasn’t enough shit already. “Hmm. So, like out of nowhere. Bang! I could be in Kansas sitting on top of some old batty chick wearing red slippers?”
    He nodded somberly. “Yep.”
    â€œWell, screw me blue.”
    â€œI’m a married man, Ms. Haddock.”
    To say I was shocked wouldn’t do my reaction justice. “I…”
    The corner of his mouth quirked again. These country folk could deadpan humor with the best of them. “So you’ll stay in tonight?”
    â€œUh, yeah. I can manage that.”
    He looked so damned relieved, I got a warm-fuzzy. Someone in this town cared about my well-being. Then another thought struck me. “If a tornado hits, where do I go? What do I do?” Crap! I didn’t have a basement or anything. There was a crawlspace, but how many other things would I be sharing it with? Spiders? Snakes? What other godforsaken creepy-crawlies?
    He seemed to chew on his response for a moment before he answered. “Well, if you hear the sirens, just head on over to the courthouse. It has an underground shelter for folks without basements.”
    â€œOkay, I can get there.” But could I get there fast enough? I wondered just how quick adrenaline would carry me if a violent wind chased after me.
    â€œI’m not saying it’s going to happen.” He shrugged. “Just in case, though, stay in.”
    â€œCool. Got it. Fantastic. Thanks for the warning,” I mumbled, not thankful at all. The threat of bad weather seemed like one more way for this town to try to get rid of me. If I woke up in Kansas in the morning with my place on top of some wayward witch, I was going to be pissed.
    Sheriff Taylor patted me on the shoulder and my eyes rolled back. A large banded raccoon hissed, eyes flashing as it leapt into the air on the attack.
    I shrieked, stumbling back. When my ass bumped against the counter, and no actual animal landed on my head, I peeked out from behind my sheltering arm. The sheriff was staring at me as if I was crazy. He acted like he hadn’t ever seen a woman scared witless by a vision. Imagine that.
    â€œI’m fine.” I waved my hand. “I thought I saw a bee.”