A Country Marriage by Sandra Jane Goddard

own.’
    She frowned, and then as the cart lurched forward, reached out to steady herself.
    ‘Truly? But the farmhouse is lovely, an’ you got all the family there.’
    ‘Aye, I won’t disagree with you that it’s a lovely house,’ Ellen responded with a quick glance to the backs of her in-laws, ‘but the family, well, that’s a different story; they’re a real… funny lot. And although it might seem to you that there’s plenty of space, truth of the matter is that you’re never alone; not even for a single minute. And there’s always someone ready to tell you what to do, too and you don’t get no say in what it is or when you do it, either.’ She, too, glanced to her in-laws. Surely Ellen was courting trouble to talk like this? ‘If you stay on the right side of Ma Strong, though,’ she was continuing, her voice little more than a whisper now, ‘then for the most part, she’s fair-handed. And Annie can be friendly enough if the mood takes her but Tabitha , well, she’s a real…’ she glanced again at the shadowy profile of her mother-in-law, ‘…nuisance. Always skulking off, that one. And even though everyone knows how she is, she still gets away with it. Don’t get me wrong Mary, I know it’s not my place to mind these things but when she doesn’t do her share of the work, it just means that someone else has to.’
    ‘Yes, I see that.’
    ‘And that’s why I envy you, even if envy is such an ugly sin. My point, though, is that at least at Keeper’s Cottage, the two of you are on your own—’
    ‘Aye, that’s true but—’
    ‘—with only yourselves to look out for.’
    She pressed her lips together. The prospect of life at Keeper’s Cottage clearly seemed more attractive to Ellen than it did to herself. In fact, in her own mind, it had already taken on a rather bleak air. And while she wouldn’t admit that to anyone else, perhaps she could share those feelings with Ellen. It might help her to work out whether they were normal or not. Or at the very least, understandable.
    ‘A place of our own is… well, it’s nice, of course it is but…’ The problem, she realised then, was that it would be all too easy to appear ungrateful. ‘…and no doubt you’ll think me silly but you see, before I came here, I didn’t know that George wasn’t going to be working at the farm any more. I only found out a few days back that he’s going to work for the estate. And when he does, well, being up at the cottage means that as often as not, I shan’t see another soul all day long.’
    When Ellen’s woollen mitten clasped the bare skin of her hand, it felt cold and rough.
    ‘You had no reason to know otherwise, I suppose. But oh, Mary, I’d still rather be in my own home, even if it did mean being alone all day. ’Tis surely preferable to the constant frettin’ an’ bossin’ an’ arguin’ that goes on all day at Summerleas. George was always all right and of course, Will, too but you should hear how Tom and Pa Strong do set about each other. And anyway, I fancy you won’t be on your own for long.’
    ‘I don’t know what you mean.’
    ‘Once you start with the babies.’
    ‘Oh.’
    ‘Won’t have a minute of loneliness then.’
    ‘No, I suppose not.’
    ‘But then you’ll be used to all that, what with you being the eldest daughter.’
    Half turning from Ellen’s gaze, she sighed. A half-dozen siblings hardly felt like adequate preparation for having a child of her own. Or for being left on her own with it all day long, either.
    ‘You ain’t got any yet, then?’ The speed with which Ellen ducked her head took her by surprise. And then it didn’t: five years wed and no children? That there was some sort of problem ought surely to have been obvious to her. ‘Forgive me, I didn’t mean to pry.’
    ‘No, it’s not an unreasonable question. See, Mary, I’ve fallen several times, three, in fact. But God called them all back.’ And now what was she supposed to say? Nothing