Bellissimo Lotta (Beautiful Struggle): Companion Novel to Bellissimo Fortuna (The Family Trilogy Book 2) by Leigh Ann Lunsford

can’t blame you, but know I love you, and you are my miracle. My saving grace. The day Bronson was born, there was a pride in me equivalent to no other moment in my life. I loved him from the moment your mom told me about him. But you . . . knowing I was going to be the first man you loved, your hero, there aren’t words to describe that feeling. It’s hard to explain the difference, but you wove yourself so deep inside of me I was in awe that I helped create you. I looked at you that day and promised I would be the best father to you, that you would be proud of me and never leave me. I wanted to be a hero in your eyes. I don’t see that anymore. I see failure reflecting back at me, and that wounds me, but I understand it. One day, the man you decide is worthy of your future will be a lucky man, but I hope he is smart as well. Your heart, your beauty, should never be taken for granted.”
    He wipes the tears spilling down my face. I can’t believe how I’ve hurt him. He may do a lot of unsavory things, but he is still the first man who loved me. He’s always kept me safe, I’ve never doubted his love, and he is my hero. My slightly tarnished hero, but nonetheless he’s my dad. “I do love you, and you’re still the best man in my life. I’m so sorry I hurt you. Doubted you.”
    “You did nothing of the sort. Let me finish telling you this. You may want to talk to your mother; she can shed light on what you’re feeling. It wasn’t easy for her to accept, but in the end love won over common sense, and I’m a lucky man for it. So, I grew up oblivious to what your grandfather did. I knew we had money, I knew he was respected, but I never knew what he did. I was shielded more than you and Bronson because that’s the way it was done. Nobody talked about the dealings, what the job entailed. I met your mother and I fell in love at first sight. You look so much like her I sometimes lose myself in memories. I knew I had to have her, she opened her mouth and it was pure sass. Another gift you got from her.” His smile shines and his eyes twinkle in mischief. I see the memories running through his mind by the expressions dancing across his face. “So, she had goals in life. She wanted things; she grew up poor and was determined not to worry where her next meal was coming from. I had nothing to offer her. I went to my father and told him I was going to take over; inherit my legacy. Your mother wasn’t thrilled, she knew what this life required and she wasn’t too keen on partaking in it. I don’t know how or why, but by the grace of God she stuck by me.” His voice softens as he remembers their beginning.
    “When I took over we had been married for three years. I had sat in on meetings, but I had never made a decision. I learned the hard way showing any sort of weakness in this business puts everyone you love in jeopardy. The day came that I had to make a decision to kill a man . . . I couldn’t do it. I couldn’t sit there and take a man’s life. I opted to let him live.” He draws in a deep breath. “That night for retribution, he broke into the home your mom and I lived in and damn near raped her. Beat her brutally and if I hadn’t come home, it would have been worse. I didn’t hesitate, I shot and killed him in our bedroom, and I’d do it again . . . no hesitation. Hell, I’d rewind time and do it before he could have gotten anywhere near your mother. That night plagued me for years. Still does. Because of my choices from the beginning she was hurt and she was involved in all this lifestyle involved. I told her to leave, begged her. She wouldn’t. She said she loved me, and told me she was pregnant with Bronson.” He shakes his head as if he’s clearing the memory, almost too much for him to remember.
    “From that day forward, I learned to compartmentalize. Rationalize what I did. I wouldn’t allow another person near my family; they weren’t going to destroy the love I had. It was a struggle at