Christmas in Transylvania by Sandra Hill Page A

bones.”
    â€œThat’s not what I’m worried about.”
    She arched her brows at him in question.”
    â€œSweetheart, a concrete wall between us wouldn’t stop me from making love to you tonight, let alone some friggin’ blanket bundling.”
    â€œMaybe I should borrow Alex’s negligee.”
    â€œDon’t you dare!”
    Faith was already falling asleep by then, but there was a smile on her face.
    She thought she heard Karl mutter something about a five-­mile run followed by a cold shower.

 
    Chapter Seven
    It was a devilish time of the year, after all . . .
    J ASPER HATED C H RISTMAS with a passion. That’s why he was holed up in Horror, his palace in the far north. Not that ridiculous North Pole of red-­coated fat guy, elves, and flying-­reindeer madness. No, this was the true Arctic wilderness.
    â€œI brought you a bloody eggnog,” said Beltane, Jasper’s French hordling assistant, in an attempt to cheer him up. “It’s curdled just the way you like.”
    Jasper was lying on a chaise, staring out the icy window of his bedchamber. The chaise was specially made with a hole in its center to accommodate his tail, so that it didn’t make a lumpy bulge under him. Tails were the bane of all Lucipires. That and scales that were always flaking, and red eyes that burned, and claws that could do physical damage if one forgot and scratched a body part. Can anyone say jacking off? Ouch! Not that Lucipires couldn’t morph into humanoid form when needed. Still . . .
    â€œThank you, Beltane.” Jasper took a sip. “Very good.” He sighed with boredom and set aside the mug, his favorite, with the logo, “Sin Rocks!”
    â€œYou should be in a good mood, master,” Beltane said as he began to tidy Jasper’s massive bedchamber. “Your last big mission, the one in those gambling casinos, netted you almost three hundred and fifty evil humans. Most of them have already been turned into your loyal minions.”
    â€œI know.” Jasper sighed again.
    â€œStill, you are depressed.” Beltane sighed, too, in sympathy.
    â€œYes. You have to understand, Beltane, Christmas is the worst time of the year for a demon vampire. For any demon, actually. It is a time when humans celebrate goodness and generosity and cheerfulness and all that gagsome rubbish, not to mention the birth of He whom we Lucipires prefer not to mention.”
    â€œAnd the music! Do not forget the constant jingle-­belling,” Beltane said. “And the Christmas movies that go on and on and on about giving and sharing.”
    Jasper rolled his eyes in agreement. “Scrooge was a hero, in my opinion, before he went all goody-­goody, and the Grinch could be a role model for all children if they’d cut off the sickening, happily-­ever-­after ending.”
    â€œI loved that movie! Until the ending.” Beltane began to sing the lyrics to the movie sound track, something about Mr. Grinch being a cruel man. At Jasper’s frown, the boy stopped abruptly. “Sorry.”
    â€œThat’s all right.” More sighing.
    â€œPerhaps you would enjoy watching the torture of the remaining holdouts from Las Vegas. Malcolm is about to put pins in one man’s eyeballs.”
    â€œNot today.”
    â€œMay I make a suggestion, master?”
    Actually, Jasper wished Beltane would just go away and leave him to his misery, but the boy was one of the few truly faithful followers he had left. “Certainly,” he conceded.
    â€œThe humans have a saying about turning lemons into lemonade. Why not turn this distasteful time of year to your advantage?”
    â€œHow so?”
    â€œWell, there is still evil throughout the world for us to reap, even at this time of year. Perhaps a short mission would lift your spirits.”
    â€œAnd you have an idea for such a mission?” Jasper asked skeptically. Beltane,