and to the back exit.
“Listen bitch,” he growled the second the backdoor closed. “You gonna do what I say.”
I looked him up and down. He stood before me, finger pointing towards me with his whole body tensed and ready to pounce. This is his routine whenever he felt I was defying him, and I have been conditioned to react in only one way – submission.
But not that night.
Standing before him, I didn't feel fear. Some might say it was the drink, but the reality everything changed when he offered me up. From that flash I felt nothing towards him.
I stood my ground and shouted, “No. I've put up with a lot of shit in this relationship, but I'm not doing anything like that! What the hell were you doing in there? Really ? I'm not some girl you can trade around. We had something real...”
He stepped towards me with eyes complete glazed from the drugs. “You'll fuck... whoever I tell you to fuck!”
“Jerome... We've been together for years. You know I'm not like that. I'll never been like that... That fucker in there is twisting your head. You're too high and full of too muck bravado to even realize it!” I shook my head and breathed a massive sigh. Without thinking my legs turned and I made for the car.
He pounced on me like a tiger, gripping the back of my hair. “You fucking bitch! You fucking hoe!”
“Hit me! Hit me!” I screamed at him while wrestling in his arms. “Come on! Give me your best shot, you pussy motherfucker!”
For years he broke down my spirits convincing me that I could never rely on myself. Making me truly believe I wouldn't survive without him. But in that parking lot the cage I had been trapped in opened around me. I pulled myself free and shoved him back three feet.
“What the fuck?” He stared down at me with shock in his eyes. “You... you...”
“Bitch? Is that what you were going to call me? I don't care anymore... What ever you're going to call me, whatever you're going to do - I'm not going to take it ! There's nothing you can do that'll scare me! Kill me if you want! Hit m ---”
Concrete cutting against my cheek was the first sensation I registered. My brain rattled inside my skull while complete darkness flooded my vision.
Lights out .
He punched me, and the next couple of seconds were lost forever in a haze of my rattled brain trying to protect itself.
I rolled onto my back, my dress hiked up around my thighs in the fall, shocked that I could see so many stars in the city. Though they weren't stars. They were all in my head. Jerome's making. Warmth dripped from above my left eye. I reached up and blood covered my fingers.
“You bastard!” I groaned, my voice muffled by the ringing in my ears. “You no good bastard...”
Jerome didn't reply. His feet tread across me and made their way for his car. He opened the trunk and went for another one of those cocaine filled bags.
“You bastard!” Through the pain I hissed at him. I dragged myself crawling to him, the parking lot scratching up my elbows and knees. Blood flowed onto the concrete from my numb forehead and left a trail behind me. Yet, the pain didn't matter. I wanted to get to him. Hurt him! I wasn't going to run from this blow. I found his ankle and dug my nails into his calf.
“You crazy ass bitch!” Jerome jumped back hollering out. “Didn't that fist teach you nothin'?”
I reeled. With an all powerful kick he booted me in the stomach leaving me in agonizing pain. With it all the fight left me, along with the blood I coughed up onto my chest.
“ Ba...stard!” I whimpered out and bit down on my bottom lip to stop myself from crying.
He knelt down beside me and pressed the weight of his knee into my back. “Still buggin? I thought the first one would have knocked some sense into you... Call me a fool... But you never learn, bitch , do you? Now listen up, you good for nothing whore . I'm gonna take this block of coke here and have some fun tonight. I don't want you here. You'd