If You Still Want Me by CE Kilgore Page B

feet.
    Letting Saul go was one of the hardest things
I've ever done in my life, but I know in my heart it was the right
thing to do. We each need to get ourselves back on stable ground
without repeatedly pulling one another back into the muck we've
stirred up and let stagnate over the years. I hope he'll eventually
understand why I've done this to us. I hope he uses the opportunity
to stop letting Austin run from everything, and I hope they both
still love me in the end.
    “ Gin!” Joseph's voice crashes
into my thoughts as he slaps his cards down on the
table.
    Jerry hoots with a laugh as Tabi grumbles,
showing her nearly completed hand. “I swear, you better not be
passing him cards under the table again, Daddy.”
    Daddy gives his best innocent smile. “You know I
only did that because he was the youngest and you play a mean game
of Gin Rummy.”
    “ C'mon, Tabi,” Joey grins
wide, boastfully rubbing it in. “Don't be a sorry
sport.”
    “ Six games in row doesn't make
me sorry,” she narrows her eyes. “It makes me suspicious.” Her dark
brown glare turns on me. “Especially since the card-shark here
hasn't won a single hand tonight.”
    “ I'm not as good as I used to
be,” I shrug.
    “ Uh-hu,” Tabi keeps that glare
on me.
    Jerry gets up and kisses Tabi's brow. “I'm gonna
go check on our baby girl to make sure Joey's winning streak aint
woke her up.”
    Joey snorts. “That girl could sleep through the
four horsemen playing polo in the back yard.”
    “ Takes after my Queen Tabi,”
Jerry laughs then ducks past Tabitha's hand as it attempts to slap
his arm.
    “ Keep it up while I'm too
bloated to retaliate,” she calls after him. “You think women don't
know how to remember payback owed?”
    “ Like elephants,” Joseph
mumbles then winces as Tabi kicks him under the table.
    “ I'm pregnant, not
deaf.”
    Daddy chuckles into his coffee mug next to me.
Despite my thoughts being elsewhere, I'm glad I'm sitting here next
to him. It's good to see him happy, and I know that's part of the
reason I've considered moving down here. I tell myself it was a
shallow threat to get Saul's feet moving, but when I'm here with my
dad, it doesn't seem quite so shallow anymore.
    “ You alright, princess?” he
whispers to me as Tabi and Joey continue to spar with
words.
    “ Just a bit tired,” I lie and
he knows it, so I amend my statement with a touch more truth. “A
lot on my mind.”
    “ Whenever you're ready to
talk,” he leaves the rest unfinished, smiling instead.
    I've never had to worry about my daddy not
listening when I needed him to. From the moment my momma and I
showed up on his church's doorstep looking for shelter, he's always
listened to every single word. I'm just afraid that this time, my
words might hurt him.
    “ Excuse me,” Joseph stands
from the table as his cellphone rings from his back
pocket.
    “ Joesph,” Tabi warns. “This
is family night. You tell your
girlfriend you're busy.”
    “ Right,” Joseph hesitates on
the word, giving me a glance before he exits the room to
answer.
    “ Girlfriend?” Daddy perks up.
“Joseph got himself a girl?”
    “ He won't say,” Tabi crosses
her arms as Jerry reenters the room.
    “ Let the boy have his
business,” Jerry playfully scoffs. “Remember when we was his age?
All hushed phone conversations and sitting on Elijah's porch with
quiet laughs.”
    “ I remember,” Daddy answers
first. “Tabi was tickled when you came by or called, and
embarrassed when I tried to pry.”
    “ And I was afraid,” Jerry
admits. “Good woman, beautiful, and daughter to a great man –
shoot, what could a boy like me offer?”
    “ A warm heart,” Tabitha
responds in a rare moment of unguarded affection.
    “ You treat my Tabitha right,”
Daddy adds. “I saw it the moment I met you – that you'd be the
right boy for my girl.”
    “ Thank you, sir,” Jerry bows
his head respectfully as he smiles. “Maybe Joey done found himself
a beautiful soul