Love Scars by Lark Lane

doesn’t like her for you,” she said.
    Because he likes her for himself . The idea hit me with a jolt of anger. The dude was thinking of stealing Holly away from me. But this wasn’t like before the money, when the chicks always looked at him first. I finished drying the pot and slammed it onto the hook on the rack.
    The living room was empty. Scarlett must have taken Holly to see Mom’s studio. I took in a breath of air and blew it out. I wasn’t going to be an ass about this. Brad was still my best friend, and Holly had obviously chosen me.
    I headed across the lawn toward the garden to tell Brad we were leaving. I’d just say goodbye and leave it at that. Take the high road. I wouldn’t tell him I was on to how he felt. By the time I reached the maze that led to the garden, I was over it.
    Holly loved me. She had my ring on her finger, and I couldn’t see her taking it off. I wasn’t mad at Brad. I felt sorry for the poor bastard.
    As I walked through the hedge-lined path, Holly’s voice filtered through the vegetation. “I’ll marry J.D. and then divorce him in a couple of years.”
    I stopped moving. I couldn’t have heard that right.
    “I’ll be rich after the settlement—he’s so in love, he’ll never think about a prenuptial agreement. Don’t you see, Brad? Then we can be together.”
    I felt socked in the gut. A gigantic rhododendron hid me from their view, and the conversation went on.
    “Holly, you’ve got it all wrong,” Brad said. “I don’t love you. In fact, you pretty much disgust me.”
    “But Brad…”
    “I never told J.D. how you’re always coming on to me because for some crazy reason the dude does love you, and he’s my best friend. I just wish he’d figure you out before it’s too late.”
    “No, Brad. You love me. I know you do. I’ve seen the way you look at me.”
    My chest was a mass of pain where my heart had been ripped out.
    “You’re embarrassing yourself, Hol,” Brad said. “Go away now. Please.”
    I didn’t go back through the maze. I crashed through the hedges and made a straight line to the house. I stood on the lanai for a few minutes to catch my breath. A seagull flew over, and its scream sounded like mocking laughter.
    All the way back to Seattle Holly didn’t talk. She was lost in her own thoughts with no awareness I’d already cut her out of my life. She seemed a bit surprised when I dropped her off at her folks’ house. She’d been spending most nights with me at my high-rise condo on Union Street. But she didn’t argue. At the door she raised her lips for me to kiss her.
    I wanted to vomit. I forced myself to kiss her on the forehead.
    “Goodbye, Holly,” I said.
    I got all the way to the car before she said, “J.D., is something wrong?” I didn’t say a word. I didn’t turn around. I opened the door of my Corvette and smiled. I know the smile was bitter.
    The next morning I bought Brad a black and silver Range Rover—a late birthday present, I told him—and that night he drove us to the Seahawks’ opening game. I told him I wasn’t going to marry Holly after all, that I’d caught her sexting with Mike, the football player she’d thrown over to go with me to the prom.
    “Jeez, dude. I’m sorry,” Brad said.
    “Yeah, well,” I said. “Good riddance.”
    I never told Brad what I’d overheard on Orcas Island. There was no point. I look back on it ten years and countless women later, and I laugh at myself.
    But I don’t laugh at the pain. Maybe being so young made it worse. I was so fucking vulnerable then. I never wanted to feel that pain again.
    “Dammit!” Brad’s editorial comment reached the kitchen from the TV room.
    Poor bastard. I knew what he must be going through now with Lisa. And worse because that Frank guy didn’t deserve her. Everybody loved Frank. Maybe it was just loyalty to my friend, but I suspected Frank was secretly an asshole.
    I brought out the rest of the six-pack and some more chips. The Mavs