Nothing Like You by Lauren Strasnick

eventually blurting, “But I don’t want to go alone.”
     
    “So take Nils.”
     
    “Nils doesn’t think it’s a good idea.”
     
    “Well, Holly, I can’t go. I mean I really feel for you, but you should have asked me before scheduling the appointment if you wanted me to come so bad.”
     
    “But I did ask you. I left you that note.”
     
    He started the car. “Well, I dunno, maybe I just didn’t get it.” But that was a lie. I was sure he got the note.
     
    “Well, if I cancel and reschedule, will you come with me then? When would be better for you?”
     
    “I really don’t know. Just not tomorrow, okay? Next week’s bad too.”
     
    I smiled but I didn’t feel happy. I felt shitty and desperate but I said, “Okay,” anyway.
     
    So I cancelled the appointment and rescheduled withFrank Gellar: Psychic Medium, for Saturday, the weekend after next
,
at three p.m. And I felt like a real pussy doing it but I wanted what I wanted. I wanted Paul there.
     
    “I’m eating with you today,” Saskia said, sticking a fork into her chickpea-iceberg lettuce salad and sitting down. My eyes darted to her usual table, where her friend Sarah something-or-other sat with a whole bunch of Saskia-types, eating and looking conspicuously happy. “Won’t your friends miss you?” I asked, gesturing to her table.
     
    “They can do without me for one day. Besides, you’re much more interesting.” She brought a forkful of salad to her mouth. I quickly looked around the room, scanning the place for Paul. He had class this block, I’d never seen him at Wednesday lunches, but still, I had to ask, “Where’s your boyfriend?”
     
    “Western Civ. He eats late lunch on Wednesday.” She took another bite, talking and chewing and somehow still seeming adorable. “What about
your
boyfriend?” she teased, meaning Nils. I knew this now.
     
    “He’s
not
my boyfriend,” I said. “But, him too. Late lunch. Wednesdays I usually eat alone and read.”
     
    She shoveled another bite of salad into her mouth. “Weekend plans?”
     
    “What? No. Maybe I’ll see a movie with my dad.” I shrugged. “You?” I winced having to ask. I knew her weekend plans already.
     
    She smiled sheepishly. “My birthday.”
     
    I feigned surprise and took a bite of sandwich. “No way!”
     
    “Mm. We’re going to Catalina.”
     
    “Oh, wow—”
     
    “Camping.”
     
    “So great.”
     
    “We haven’t been on a family trip in so long. And I get to bring Paul this time, so I’m psyched.”
     
    “Bet you are,” I said, suddenly unable to meet her eye. I checked the clock on the wall. I looked at my bagged lunch, at her salad, down at my hands. I changed the subject. “Your family’s big?” I asked.
     
    She sunk back in her chair. “Not really. Me, Mom, step-dad. My brother.”
     
    “He’s older? Your brother?”
     
    “Technically, yes. He’s nineteen. But I’m the older one, really. I’m the one who takes care of him, you know?” She polished off the last of her lunch. “Not the other way around.”
     
    I nodded, remembering Paul’s words: Her brother was sick. I wondered what that meant, then said, “You really like lettuce, huh?”
     
    She glanced down at her empty plate. “I like lettuce,” she said, her shoulders shaking with laughter. “I really do.”
     

Chapter 19
     
    Nils and I were poking around Goodwill, drinking milk-shakes out of tall paper cups.
     
    “So, you’ll be happy to know I’m gonna end it.”
     
    “End what?” I tugged a sequined dress off a rack packed with evening wear. “You think I could pull this off?”
     
    “Where are you gonna wear that? To prom?”
     
    “I’m not going to prom.”
     
    “Of course you’re not.”
     
    I stuck the dress back on the rack. Nils ran his hand down the arm of a men’s suit jacket that was hanging on the wall, displayed. “Did you hear what I said?”
     
    “About the dress?”
     
    “About me ending things. With