to know the difference, so why did I care about his past so much?
I chatted with Gray for several more minutes and we made tentative plans to play racquetball sometime the following week. My mind was stuck on the situation with Jag long after I disconnected the phone. It was if I couldn’t move on once I thought the word arrangement in the same sentence with Jag’s name. My heart sped up as I rolled the possibilities through my brain. A lot of safe sex that didn’t require disastrous dates and explanations about my position on love and romance. The only positions would be sexual ones and I wanted to see how far I could push Jag and how far he could push me in return. It would be simple and uncomplicated.
I sat staring at my phone for a long time before I worked up the nerve to send him a simple text with three innocuous words. Are you busy? There, I took the first step and sat back and tried to relax as I waited to see how long it would take him to respond, if he did at all.
No.
His one-word answer came two hours later. Two hours! He must’ve been busy if he couldn’t answer me in two fucking hours. Maybe fucking is what he’d been doing for those two hours and only answered me when he wasn’t busy. I groaned out loud when I realized that I sounded like an angry, jilted teenager. I had heard plenty of them over the years arguing with their boyfriends and girlfriends in the hallways and I wasn’t pleased that I had taken a turn in that direction. I had a nice set of balls and it was time I used them and took a chance.
Can I come over? Go big or stay home. This time his response was immediate.
I’ll leave your name at the security gate.
I showered and shaved before I brushed and flossed my teeth. My grooming had more to do with ridding myself of nervous energy than any real expectations of what would happen at his house. Okay, wishful thinking played a big part in the way I manscaped before I put on a pair of ass hugging jeans and a sweatshirt.
I showed my id to the guard on duty and he opened the gate for me to enter. My heartbeat accelerated at a rate much faster than the speed I drove through his neighborhood. I hadn’t really worked through what I wanted to say in the hours that I waited for him to respond. Instead of being productive, I behaved like a whiny bitch boy. I was no closer to a plan when he opened the door after I rung the bell.
I don’t know what I expected to see in his dark eyes, but the wariness in his expression took me by complete surprise. My excitement faded at the thought that I might be to blame for his hesitation. Well, fuck! Instead of him grabbing me by my shirt and hauling me inside, he quietly stepped aside so I could enter.
“Where do you want to do this?” Gone was the hot, hungry voice I had come to associate with him and in its place was a sad resignation that doused any lusty feelings I had. I turned in his foyer to face him.
“What?”
“You came here for sex, right? I would have thought you wore yourself out with the twink last night, but apparently he wasn’t enough to get it done. So, where do you want to do this?”
“I didn’t come here for sex.” Liar. His expression said he didn’t believe a word I just said. “You’re one to talk, Bruce . You ran off to attend to someone’s emergency needs last night, so why are you giving me shit? Afraid you can’t get it up so soon?”
“You doubting my virility now, Bones?” Jag’s nostrils flared as he advanced on me. “Or are you just picking a fight so we can tussle and scrape before we fuck it out of our systems. There’s no need to pretend or put on airs. You are here to get fucked and I’m up for the task.” I backed up with every step he took forward until his large frame pressed me against a wall. He was up alright and making it very hard for me to concentrate.
“I didn’t come here to fight or get fucked.” I licked my lips that had suddenly turned dry from all of my labored breathing. He