The Woman of Rome by Alberto Moravia

longer paid any attention to it; I felt as happy as if the room looked out on a beautiful garden filled with trees. I imagined the life Gino and I would lead there — how we would sleep, make love. I had in mind other things I intended to buy as soon as I could — a vase, a lamp, an ashtray, or some other ornament over in the corner. My only regret was that I could nothave a bathroom like the one I had seen at the villa, with shining white tiles and faucets, or at least a new, clean one. I was determined to keep my room extremely neat and clean. The visit to the villa had convinced me that a luxurious life began with order and cleanliness.

4
    S OMEWHERE ABOUT THIS TIME , while I was still continuing to pose in the studios, I struck up a friendship with another model called Gisella. She was a tall, well-made girl, with a very white skin, dark curly hair, small, deepset blue eyes, and a large red mouth. Her character was quite the opposite of mine. She was quick-tempered, sharp, and spiteful, and at the same time practical and self-seeking; perhaps it took these very differences to unite us in friendship. I knew of no other work she had besides that of being a model, but she dressed far better than I could, and did not conceal the fact that she received presents and money from a man she introduced as her fiancé. I remember how I envied her black jacket with collar and cuffs of astrakhan that she often wore that winter. Her fiancé’s name was Riccardo; he was a tall, placid, heavily built young man, with a face as smooth as an egg, which I thought very handsome at the time. He was always sleek and shining, smothered in brilliantine, and wore new suits; his father kept a shop for men’s underwear and ties. He was simple to thepoint of silliness, good-natured, cheerful, and probably quite decent. He and Gisella were lovers, and I do not think there was any talk of marriage between them, as there was between Gino and me. But Gisella, like me, aimed at marriage, without setting too many hopes on it. As for Riccardo, I am sure the idea of marrying Gisella never crossed his mind.
    Gisella, who was very stupid but far more experienced than I, had determined that she was going to look after me and set me straight about many things. In short, she had the same ideas as Mother about life and happiness. However, in Mother’s case, these ideas were expressed in a bitter and quarrelsome way, since they were the fruit of her disappointment and hardships, whereas, in Gisella’s case, they sprang from her obtuseness, allied with her stubborn self-sufficiency. Mother was content simply to formulate her ideas, you might say, as if the statement of her principles mattered more to her than the application of them; but Gisella, who had always thought in that way and did not even dream that anyone might think differently, was astonished that I did not behave as she did. Only when I showed my disapproval, because I really could not help myself, did her astonishment give way to rage and jealousy. She suddenly discovered that I not only refused her protection and advice, but that I might even be inclined to criticize her from the height of my own cherished and disinterested aspirations, and it was then that she planned, perhaps unconsciously, to alter my judgment of her by forcing me to become like herself as quickly as possible. Meanwhile she kept on telling me that I was a fool to keep myself pure; that it was a shame to see me going around so badly dressed, living such a hard life, and that, if I wanted to, thanks to my good looks, I could completely change my whole position. At last I told her of my relationship with Gino, because I felt ashamed to have her think I knew nothing about men, but I warned her that we were engaged and were getting married shortly. She immediately asked me what Gino did and, on hearing that he was a chauffeur, she grimaced. But she asked me, nevertheless, to introduce him to her.
    Gisella was my best friend and