back. I was beyond words.
Mum didnât seem to notice all the bad vibes coming from Nani and me, though. She went on talking about decluttering, and painting and wallpapering, as if it was some kind of treat.
And all the while, I was picturing my little room with Naniâs bed in it, and Naniâs hundreds of bottles of cough linctus and nerve tonic and indigestion medicine, and her thousands of tubs of foot powder and face powder and tooth powder, and her corn plasters.
I pictured my neat shelves covered with her stuffed birds and bats and lizards, and my walls hung with her butterfly and moth collection, and every last bit of my carpet littered with her big vests, and I badly wanted to cry.
âAs Shahid says, itâs only for a couple of months,â Mum told Nani. âThen you can move back. And think of all the extra space youâll have when we clear out a few things. . .â
Naniâs nostrils flared wider than ever. She banged the table with her fist, sending Bilal an eyeful of wet Weetabix. He began to howl.
âNot one thing will you clear out,â Nani hissed through clenched teeth. âNot one single, solitary thing, as I live and breathe.â Then she rammed her spoon hard into her mouth, and didnât say another word till bedtime.
So that was Worries one and two. And, in thelight of
them
, Worry Number three hardly seems worth mentioning.
Worry Number three concerned Kylie.
Now, I donât think Iâm a jealous person. I try not to be, anyway. But that summer I was really jealous of Kylie. And the reason was Kylieâs pets.
Kylieâs
menagerie
.
I would have loved a pet. Iâd pleaded for a dog, but Mum and Dad said that was out of the question because Nani couldnât take it for walks during the day while the rest of us were out.
Iâd begged for a cat, but they said Nani was allergic â though how anyone whoâs lived all their life surrounded by stuffed leopards and lynxes could possibly be allergic to a mere
cat
is beyond me.
Eventually Iâd had to settle for a goldfish.
It was a really nice goldfish, with big black eyes and a frilly tail, and I kept it in a bowl on the shelf above my bed and called it Smartypants.
I liked watching Smartypants, and feeding him and so on, but what I really wanted was something I could cuddle.
Kylie, on the other hand, was
tripping over
things tocuddle â what with her dadâs dozens of ferrets, and her mumâs seven (yes,
seven
) Papillon dogs, and her brotherâs white rat, Fang.
And now, as if that wasnât enough, theyâd only gone and given her a pair of hamsters.
Russian Dwarf hamsters, to be precise. The cutest, cuddliest animals you ever saw, with little brown stripy bodies and little white tummies and furry little feet and bright little eyes like shiny black pinheads.
âIâm calling them Toffee ânâ Caramel,â Kylie told me when she took me up to her room to see them. ââCause theyâre s-o-o-o-o sweet.â
And, boy, were Toffee ânâ Caramel ever sweet! Kylie and I played with them all the time. We loved letting them crawl up our sleeves and sniff our necks and dive down under our jumpers and out again. They were drop-dead gorgeous!
I didnât begrudge Kylie Toffee ânâ Caramel one bit, and she was great at sharing them with me. But no matter how hard I tried not to be, I was still jealous.
That summer, it seemed to me that Kylie had everything going for her. But, as it turned out, Kylie had a big worry too. Kylie had Sniper.
Sniper
The evening after the âAuntie Shabnamâ news broke, Kylie and me were in her bedroom building a castle for Toffee ânâ Caramel, and that was when she told me about Sniper.
Castle Hamster was amazing. Weâd collected loads of old washing-up liquid bottles and toilet roll insides, and weâd glued them onto a big cardboard box to make turrets and secret