tunnels.
Then weâd painted the whole thing bright pink and added sparkly detail with glitter pens and red love-heart stickers. It looked quite magical.
Kylie was trying to get a cardboard flag to stick straight up from the battlements, and she was getting more and more frustrated because it kept keeling over. Suddenly she said, âMy mumâs forty next week. Which is old, Yosser, really old.â
I held the flag while she fixed it with more Sellotape. âThatâs great, Kylie,â I said. âYour mum loves parties â and thereâs sure to be a
humungous
one.â
Kylie nodded. âWeâre having a surprise fancy-dress party for her the night before, âcause her birthdayâs on Sunday,â she said. âItâs in the Masonsâ Arms and Dad says no expense has been spared.â
She stuck the last bit of Sellotape on, and sat back. The flag was still wonky. She looked over at me, and for a moment I thought she was going to cry. When she spoke again, the words came out in a rush.
âIâm worried Sniperâs going to ruin it all,â she said. âHeâs been in loads of trouble this summer, him and his mates. He wonât do anything Mum and Dad say, and the other week the police came round and they had a long talk. Then they issued him with a warning.â
She took a deep breath. Her bottom lip was trembling.
âHeâs said some terrible things to Mum and Dad, Yosser,â she went on, very quietly. âHeâs been like a different person these past few months.â
I was horrified. Everyone knew that Dean âSniperâ Teasdale was a bit wild, but I thought he was cool. In fact, Sniper was another thing I envied Kylie.
Iâd
have liked a big brother with Heavy Metal T-shirts and a ring in his nose. Iâd have swopped Sniper for Bilal any day.
âMumâs beside herself with worry,â Kylie went on. âYou can tell, because sheâs spending hours and hours in her vegetable patch. She canât think beyond her potatoes and her carrots and her purple-leafed broccoli. . .â
Kylie sighed. âItâs not healthy, Yosser,â she said. âItâs like sheâs in denial.â
I stuck a big bit of Blu-tack on the flag so that it didnât dare go wonky again, and then I crawled over to Kylie and put my arm round her.
âIâm sure Sniper wouldnât do anything to spoil your mumâs special birthday,â I said. âHeâs just going through a difficult phase.â
Then, hoping to cheer her up, I asked, âWhat are you going to get her?â
It had the opposite effect. Kylie sighed again.
âI donât know,â she said. âI canât seem to get my head round the present. I think itâs because Iâm so worried about everything else.â
I gave her another squeeze. Then I went over to the hamster cage and lifted Toffee ânâ Caramel out.
âCome on, Your Majesties,â I said, in as jolly a voiceas I could muster. âAllow me to transport you to your royal residence.â
I put them down outside the portcullis (which weâd drawn on in silver pen), pulled on a piece of string to raise it, and pushed their bottoms till they slid inside. Then I lowered the portcullis and left them to settle in.
âIâll help you find the perfect present for your mum,â I told Kylie. âSomething really pretty.â
Kylie looked a bit better then, and when one of the royal hamsters popped its head up and peered over the pink battlements, she cheered right up.
âI was thinking of a jewellery box,â she said. âOne lined with red velvet that plays music and has a ballerina going round. Only Iâm kind of strapped for cash.â
Then her voice changed. âI was wondering. . .â she said, and then she bit her lip.
I thought she was going to ask me for a loan, because she sounded like I do when Iâm