Chapter 1
Lily
I was aching with how much I needed him. There would be bruises from his fingers on my hips, but I didn’t care—more than that, some depraved part of me wanted this. I wanted his mark on me.
Slut . Chris’s voice echoed in my head and I stiffened.
“Lily?” Donovan’s voice had changed. His hand came to rest in the small of my back and he tugged the blindfold down. “Are you all right?”
I looked down, trying to catch my breath.
“Lily.” He slid onto the couch and pulled me down. His arms were firm around me, but gentle. His fingers lifted my chin so he could meet my eyes.
“Chris said…” My voice trailed away. I had hoped he would interrupt me.
He didn’t. He was going to make me say it out loud.
“Chris said it was shameful of me to sleep with you so soon after him.”
He raised an eyebrow, and I knew he was thinking about everything Chris had done.
“I know ,” I said, nettled. “I know it doesn’t make any sense. He’s the one who—” I buried my face in my hands. “But he was always so ashamed of me,” I whispered. “And every time I talk to him, I remember it and no matter what I say, it all gets turned around and—”
“Then don’t talk to him.” Donovan was smiling when I looked up. To him, it was the simplest thing in the world. “Ever again.”
I looked away with a sigh. “I can’t just cut him out of my—”
He took my chin in his fingers and pulled my face around again. “I said,” he told me softly, “don’t talk to him every again.”
“But you don’t understand—”
“That’s an order, Lily.”
I blinked. “What?”
“I told you there would be rules. This is one.”
“Why?”
His lips curved. “See if you can figure it out. In the meantime…” He pulled me close, tongue thrusting into my mouth and his lips hot on mine. He gave a growl of satisfaction when I melted against him. “You are mine,” he whispered, when he tangled his hand in my hair and pulled me a scant inch away. His eyes were burning. “You are mine . Nothing you do to obey me is shameful. You were made for me, Lily.”
I wanted, more than anything, to believe him.
I couldn’t.
“Why do you even want me?” I whispered. “I’m not elegant. I’m not—”
His fingers tightened in my hair and he shook my head slightly. “Not only will you not speak to Chris, you will not say his words. Do you understand me?”
I broke off, swallowing.
“Chris,” he murmured softly, “never knew what he had. I do.” He stood, holding me easily against his chest before depositing me gently on the floor. There was nothing gentle in his eyes, however. “Come with me.”
It was another order, and I obeyed it without question. I followed him to the bedroom and shivered while he drew my clothes off entirely. His breathing was harsh, and when he stepped away at last, his chest was heaving.
“Hold your hair up.” His voice was rough. “Turn around. Slowly. I want to see all of you.”
I closed my eyes as I turned. I could feel myself blushing fiercely. When I thought of the women he must have slept with, women with personal trainers, with perfect bodies, with money and diamonds and thousand dollar high heels and blonde hair, it was difficult not to run away. No one had ever wanted to see me like this.
Or had they? For the first time, I began to doubt. Had Chris really been right about everything? About how the other guys made fun of him because I wasn’t pretty enough? About how he was ashamed of me all the time?
I opened my eyes, and the look on Donovan’s face left no doubt of what he thought.
I moved as if in a dream. I was at his side a moment later. My fingers trembled as I unbuttoned his shirt and undid his belt. I undressed him carefully, aware of his eyes on me, skimming my fingers over his skin when I dared. Muscles rippled, smooth and hard, under my touch. I let my fingers drift over his knuckles when I drew his shirt off.
“What is it?” He was