toward the clearing. âSheâs drunk and dancing. Wonât know Iâm missing.â
âOh,â I said, wondering about her. I hadnât asked questions at school, but Iâd overheard enough to know they were an item. âHow long have yâall been dating?â I asked, wanting to get the subject on him immediately, far away from me.
He pulled his tailgate down and motioned for me to hop up. I did, and he sat down beside me. âNot sure exactly. Itâs been a casual thing for a few months.â
Casual? âWhat does casual mean?â
He gave me a crooked grin. âDo yâall not do casual in Arkansas?â
We did, I guess, but what I had seen at school wasnât what I thought of when I thought of casual. âIâm thinkingwe have two different ideas on what casual is.â
âNo. We have the same idea. Itâs Ivy who is confused on the casual thing. She likes to make it more serious than it is.â The guilt that flashed in his eyes wasnât hard to miss. He couldnât hide that. I wondered if he even believed what heâd just said.
I was expecting Ivy to come after us at any minute. Hopefully not swinging fists. I wasnât drunk, and it wouldnât be fair to her. After six months living in a facility with tough-ass chicks, I could hold my own. One ass kicking and Iâd gotten smart. Made the right friends and learned how to fight. It was the only way to survive that world.
âHave you explained casual to her?â I asked, taking a sip of water. I wanted to know if heâd actually tried to tell Ivy they were casual. Brady was a good guy. But this seemed to tarnish him some. Stringing Ivy along wasnât exactly part of his persona.
He chuckled and shook his head. âNo point. She wonât listen.â
âThen you must really like her.â
âWhy do you say that?â He frowned like my comment made no sense.
I thought it made complete sense. But then most teenage boys were idiots when it came to females and relationships. At least, thatâs been my experience.
âBecause you continue to keep her around. She canât annoy you too bad.â
He was silent a moment, then sighed. âActually, she annoys the shit out of me. Iâm just too nice to hurt her.â
He clearly looked torn up about it, but that was a weak response. No girl in her right mind wanted to be pitied and kept because the guy didnât like hurting peopleâs feelings. âIf you donât like her, stringing her along isnât exactly nice either.â
Brady turned to look at me, and I met his steady blue gaze. Iâd always had a thing for his eyes. They were piercing. Once I imagined them looking at me with love, but that had been the fantasy of an eleven-year-old girl who didnât realize what love was exactly. Or what love could do.
âSheâs got a bad home life. Stepmom is mean to her. Constantly stays on her about her body and appearance. Sheâs insecure.â
So? This still didnât mean he had to keep her around if he didnât like her. âIf you like her, then own up to it. If you donât, let her go so she can feel free to find someone who does.â
He again went silent for a few moments. I drank my water and looked up at the stars visible in the night sky. It was peaceful out here away from the party. I could forget my past and focus on the fact Iâm alive. Even if it wasnâtfair and I didnât deserve it. I was here. Breathing and able to see the moon as it lit the night sky. These were things I once didnât think about or appreciate. I was too busy trying to find happiness in ways that only lead to bad things. Terrible things.
âYouâre right,â he finally said. I took my gaze from the moon and gave him my full attention.
âOf course I am. Iâm a girl. Sheâs a girl. I know how we should be treated. What we deserve. And what you