Between Now and Goodbye by Hannah Harvey

know.'
    'When your wife is in the hospital, you should be there.' He says, 'And yet he's nowhere in sight and,' he pulls out his phone and fiddles with it, 'listen to this.' He passes me the phone and I see that it's called his dad's number. I hold it up to my ear and wait for the ringing to stop.
    'I'm sorry, the number you're calling in no longer in service...'
    The message goes on but I lower the phone. I don't need to hear the rest because I already know what it means. His dad, however hard it is to accept, isn't coming home. He found out his pregnant wife had cancer, and then left home the very next day. A note on the kitchen table saying he couldn't watch his wife die and take his child with her. He left before finding out how serious it was, before seeing i f April would be harmed, before any treatment had even been discussed let alone tried.
    Charles has always assumed that his dad simply used his mom's illness as a way out, to get away from the financial problems, the crowded house, and a family that he no longer wanted.
    At the time, I tried to get Charles to be more positive. I tried telling him that maybe the news just shocked his dad too much, and he couldn't handle it, so he'd left to process. I told him that once he'd had a chance to process, he'd be back. I was convinced that he'd be back after a few days, because what kind of person walks out on his wife when she's pregnant and sick, and not only that, but leaves his five children as well. What kind of person would do something so cruel?
    I should have known better. I of all people should have known that people do horrible things sometimes, ever to the people who they're meant to love. Even to family.
    Time passed. Days into weeks, and the hope that I'd tried to instill in Charles was vanishing in me. Then weeks became months and nobody had heard from him. Now, his phone number is out of service, and nobody, not even his parents, knows where he went.
    The only way that Charles knows that his dad is still alive, is the fact that his grandparents received one call from him about two months ago, asking them to wire him some money. They told him that April had been born, a happy, healthy little girl and that Mrs P was still alive, still fighting. He didn't come home.
    I suppose the police would be able to find him, but the fact is, he's not a missing person. He left of his own free will and he didn't do anything illegal. He just did something awful.
    'Char I'm so sorry.' My heart breaks for him as he takes his phone back, slipping it into his pocket and then leaning back in his chair. His head hits the wall with a little thud, but he doesn't even seem to register it.
    'What if I lose them both?' He says. His eyes are closed and his head is tilted back so I can see his pulse beating in his neck. Slow and steady.
    'You won't.' I choke on the words because I know that I can't promise him that. I can't say for certain that his mom will pull through, and it seems more and more likely that his dad won't ever come home.
    'Libs,' he turns to me. Eyes open now, clear and blue and shining with tears that he's holding back. 'I know you're just trying to help, but false reassurances aren't making anything better.'
    'I know, I'm sorry.'
    'Do you know what I really need?' He asks.
    'What?' I ask a little too eagerly, because I feel useless here. My mom is at least helping by fetching food and coffee. Julie may not be here, but she's at his house helping by watching the kids, and I'm just sitting here saying stupid things that I can't know are true. 'Anything you need, I'm your girl. I can and will make anything happen. Well...I mean anything that's within my physical capabilities. If there's a possible way I can do something, anything, then I'll do it.' I'm rambling and force my mouth to stay closed, pressing my lips together. He laughs, and that makes me feel a little better.
    'I just need a hug.' He says it sheepishly, as if he's handing in his man card just by saying that,