Count It All Joy by Ashea S. Goldson Page A

since before the wedding. Sure, I had seen him, and we chatted a little, but still we hadn’t talked like we used to.
    Dad sounded like he had been sleeping. “Alex, is that you?”
    â€œYes, Dad. How are you?”
    â€œI’m okay, but what’s wrong?”
    I sighed. “Nothing, Dad.”
    â€œOh, come on, I’m your father. You can’t lie to me. I can hear it in your voice.” Dad cleared his throat. “Something is wrong. Now, what happened?”
    â€œIt’s nothing, really. I’m just a little tired.”
    â€œOkay. How is Joshua?”
    â€œHe’s fine, just very busy,” I sighed. “Always working when he gets home.”
    â€œOh, I see.”
    â€œHe’s just swamped with work this time of year, that’s all.” I couldn’t believe that I was making excuses for him. Love covers all things.
    â€œIf you say so,” Dad grunted.
    â€œWhy do you sound so skeptical?”
    Dad chuckled. “Because you called me , remember?”
    â€œI know, and I’m sorry.” I paused before continuing. I had to take time to organize my thoughts and speech. “I guess neither of us has been acting like ourselves lately.”
    Dad coughed, a consequence of his previous years of smoking. “Maybe the two of you are working too hard at everything. Maybe you need a little break, Alex.”
    â€œMaybe you’re right,” I said.
    â€œAre you sure you’re all right?”
    I hesitated for a moment before I decided not to go deeper. “Yes, I am. I’ll talk to you tomorrow.”
    â€œGet some rest. Good night.”
    â€œYou too. Nite.” I hung up the phone, feeling slightly foolish.
    Was I that desperate that I had to run back to my daddy like a little girl? Mama always said I was a daddy’s girl. Maybe she was right. In any case, I needed someone. I just wasn’t sure getting my dad involved in my marital problems was the right answer.

Chapter Ten
    Joshua
    Â 
    A draft came in from the hallway as I kissed my wife and daughter good-bye. Alex was wearing one of her old cutoff T-shirts that she liked to sleep in. The sight of her beautiful legs and thighs made me want to turn around and go back inside the apartment. Instead, I whispered something sweet in her ear and gave her a look that promised I’d be back. My wife was a beautiful, thick woman, and I loved every inch of her. I squeezed Lilah once more and ran out the door with my briefcase in my hand.
    I still had my beautiful wife on my mind when I got downstairs to the parking garage and jumped into my Lincoln Navigator. Since I was on my way to work, I had to start thinking about business, banking business, because I never knew what challenges were ahead of me. Driving through Brooklyn streets didn’t bother me as much as it used to when I first moved here from Rochester.
    Back then, the streets here made me crazy. I prayed for God to deliver me from these wild drivers, honking their horns while giving me the bird or just plain cussing me out just because they’re New Yorkers, but now I was used to it. I smiled as I saw a lady who looked like she was in her midtwenties crossing the intersection with a baby stroller. Immediately, I thought of Alex and our baby, or at least the one I was going to make.
    These days I was on Alex so much I was tired, she was tired, and I didn’t know how we were ever going to have a child this way. I just knew that we needed to have one. And the more I thought about it, the more I needed it to be. Alex mentioned that we might need to see Pastor Martin for counseling, but personally, I felt like I had everything under control.
    By the time I arrived at work and got settled, customers were clamoring at my door to get the financial solutions they needed. I was happy to oblige. There were loans and more loans to approve and deny. That was my job, and I did it well. It gave me a certain satisfaction when I