Loose Screws by Karen Templeton

got into the beauty pageant stuff to begin with. But, anyway, that’s just a sidetrack issue, because then she says, out of nowhere, that she just wanted me to know Greg didn’t back out because of anybody else.”
    Two sets of eyebrows dip simultaneously.
    â€œI know,” I say. “So of course the minute she says that, I’m like, oh, crap—is she covering up something?”
    But Shelby shakes her head. “No,” she says, then swallows. “I don’t think that’s why he dumped you, either.”
    Terrie and I just look at her. Shelby continues eating, oblivious.
    Then Terrie squints at me. “But you are ready to rip his entrails out, right?”
    Shelby glances up for this. I sigh. “I don’t know. I should be. I mean, I am, but…” I look from one to the other. “I think mostly I’m just confused. And hurt.”
    Terrie humphs. Shelby nods, even though I can tell the whole thing’s going over her head. She clearly can’t imagine her and Mark ever going through anything like this.
    â€œSo,” Terrie says. “She know where the jerk is?”
    â€œNo. Or so she swears. But then…she said I should forgive him, give him a second chance.”
    â€œLike hell,” Terrie says. “Besides, it’s kinda hard to forgive somebody whose sorry ass isn’t around for you to forgive.”
    I open my mouth to say something, but nothing comes out. I feel Shelby’s hand light on my wrist. A light breeze from the air conditioner stirs her hair. “You still love him, don’t you?” she asks, a note of hope hovering in her wispy voice. Shelby cannot stand an unhappy ending. I don’t think she’s ever quite forgiven Shakespeare for Romeo and Juliet.
    â€œThe man stood her up,” Terrie interjects. “What do you think?”
    â€œWhat’s that got to do with how she feels?” My cousin may be the most gentle soul in the world, but that doesn’t mean she can’t stick up for her convictions. And right now, she’s glaring at Terrie like a Yorkie whose chew toy is being threatened. “I mean, Mark once forgot my birthday, and I was so hurt I could have spit. But that didn’t mean I didn’t still love him, did it?”
    I can tell Terrie is fighting the urge to bang her head on the table. Shelby is no dummy, believe me—she’d been a crack editor for a major magazine prior to her deciding to stay home with her first baby—but her eternally optimistic nature has definitely corroded her brain when it comes to matters of the heart.
    In any case, I wrest back the conversation, since I called the meeting. “ Anyway, what I said was, I didn’t know what I was feeling.”
    They’re both frowning at me again.
    Exasperated, I throw both hands into the air. “Whaddya want me to say? Okay, no, it’s not like I expect this to get patched up—sorry, Shel—but I’m not like you, either, Terrie. I haven’t had the practice you’ve had at getting over men.”
    â€œGee, thanks.”
    â€œOkay, so that didn’t exactly come out right, but you know what I mean.” I reach for the cheesecake; Terrie slaps my hand. So I guess I’m stuck with the ravioli. I get up to stick the plastic tub in Shelby’s microwave. “In any case, while a good part of me says I should write him off,there’s another part of me that isn’t sure. I mean, if he should come back.”
    Terrie is clearly appalled. “You have got to be kidding. You’d crawl back to the skunk?”
    â€œDid I say that?” The microwave beeps at me; I take out the ravioli, sink back into the chair at the table with a disgusted sigh, although I’m not sure what I’m disgusted at. Or with. Or about. My own ambivalence, maybe. Or that Greg’s actions have put me into this untenable position. “Of course I’m not about to crawl