Talk to Strangers: How Everyday, Random Encounters Can Expand Your Business, Career, Income, and Life by David Topus

luggage or loaded down with a suitcase, briefcase, laptop case, etc.
That looks like a recipe for a trip to the chiropractor.
Wow, you look like you’re ready for anything!
Running away from home?
You know, I really think most of us have too much stuff! I just don’t understand why people have to hold on to everything they’ve ever owned!
Have you seen the show Hoarders?
Someone on an elevator leaving the office well after 5:00
So, was it a good day?
(Looking at your watch) Well, I have a feeling the company got their money’s worth from you today!
I’m sure you’re not getting paid enough to work this late.
Someone reading a book
Good book? What’s it about?
Nothing like a good book, huh?
That looks like a really dull book.
I read that! (and then give away the ending)
Someone wearing a sweater at the very beginning of autumn
Wow, that’s the first time I have seen anyone in a sweater this season. I guess there’s no denying that cooler temperatures are upon us.
Isn’t it a little early for a sweater? What a lousy reminder of what lies ahead.
Someone walking a dog
How cute. What’s its name?
Is it a male or female, mind if I take a look?
I’ve heard that breed is really difficult and ends up turning on its master.
     
    A simple yet relevant comment, observation, question, or remark that captures a shared experience or circumstance is sure to trigger a nice connection. Focusing on the other person, and saying something that resonates with him or her, creates a comfortable start for both parties.
     
    Chapter at a Glance
     
     
 
There is always something to say to broach a conversation with a stranger. However, avoid commenting on the weather.
     
     
Remarks about a common experience or situation are great for building rapport.
     
     
Asking about how the other person likes his or her personal technology is sure to get a meaningful response.
     
     
Compliments are almost guaranteed to start a positive conversation.
     
     

Chapter 15
     
    Get on Their Wavelength
     
    Most public venues carry a veneer of unfamiliarity and personal privacy, sometimes even cynicism. People don’t typically appear open or available for friend making or network building in public places. However, it usually doesn’t mean they don’t want to; it’s just that they don’t think you want to. There is also that creep factor we mentioned earlier—that fear that the person nearby or approaching is a weirdo. That’s why the way you initiate conversations and build the rapport is critical to making a successful connection.
     
    People build relationships in real time and over time. From the instant you attempt to break through another person’s privacy barrier, either verbally or nonverbally, he or she will have to decide whether or not to engage in conversation with you. Your tone of voice, body posture, eye contact—and yes, that universal gesture of friendliness and approachability, your smile—will all be the key success factors in breaking through the veil of anonymity. The other person will be assessing you as the conversation progresses, checking you out, determining whether you are safe, secure, and, well . . . normal . A sense of comfort will settle into the conversation over time, and you will be on your way to a new and potentially lucrative association.
     
    The good news is that people like people who are like them. It’s just a fact of human nature, and one that’s been proven in studies by social scientists. But you needn’t be a communication expert to know it’s true. Just think about the people you are naturally attracted to; chances are, they’re a lot like you.
     
    And because people like people who like them, or at least who are like them, it’s essential to align yourself with your new acquaintances from the start. That means getting on their wavelength, being curious about them, and showing interest in what they’re interested in.
     
    Not long ago, I found myself sitting next to someone on a small