Wishes and Tears by Dee Williams

her nice things? Did they keep her well dressed? Janet looked at the clock. All day at the office she had gone through every moment of Paula being born again. Once old Mrs Baker told her off for daydreaming. Janet smiled to herself. She’d have a fit if she knew what I was thinking about, she thought. She tried to visualize what Paula would look like with her dark eyes and hair. Was it straight or curly? Short or long? She wanted to cry and felt her heart would break. Was it possible to find out where she was?
    Throughout the summer Mark came home every weekend. More and more Janet looked forward to seeing him. Even though he looked tired they still went dancing.
    â€˜Danny certainly keeps me busy,’ he said in the interval when they were having a cold drink.
    â€˜Do you enjoy working for him?’
    â€˜I think so. I’ve certainly learnt a lot about the second-hand car business and the dodgy deals that go on. By the way, I’m getting a car next week.’
    â€˜Can you drive?’
    â€˜Course, it’s part of the job, but I passed my test in the army. If you like I’ll teach you.’
    â€˜Would you? That would be super.’
    â€˜So next week, Miss Slater, we will be coming here in style.’
    She giggled.
    On Saturday Janet stood waiting at the gate for Mark. She couldn’t believe her eyes when he drew up in a gleaming black car.
    â€˜Hop in,’ he called.
    She did so, and sat back, sinking into the soft green leather upholstery. ‘This is really lovely,’ she said, running her hands over the walnut dashboard.
    â€˜Would have liked something a bit flashy, but you can’t beat an old Morris for reliability.’
    â€˜Did it cost a lot?’
    â€˜Na, not now I’m in the trade and in the know. Say, what about we go for a spin instead of the dance?’
    â€˜That’ll be great, just as long as I get back about the same time. You know what my father’s like.’
    They sped along the country lanes and laughed at silly things. They stopped to stroll on the downs as the night was just turning. The sunset lit up the sky with fire.
    â€˜It’s such a beautiful evening,’ said Janet as they walked along. ‘It’s times like this when I wish I could live for ever.’
    Mark sat on the grass. ‘You don’t want to bother with wasting wishes like that. Wish for money and things it can bring.’
    Janet sat down beside him. ‘Yes, but can it bring happiness?’
    â€˜Dunno. But it sure can make life a lot better. Take Danny - it won’t be long before he moves.’
    â€˜What, the business?’
    â€˜No, out of the flat.’
    â€˜Why’s that?’
    â€˜He’s making a packet. He’s talking about getting a real posh house.’
    â€˜What about his flat?’
    â€˜I’m thinking of taking it over.’
    Janet laughed.
    â€˜What’s so funny?’
    â€˜You. A man of property.’
    â€˜It’s only a grotty old flat and I’d only be renting it. In fact that’s something I’d like to talk to you about, Janet.’
    She stiffened. She knew this was going to be a serious conversation. ‘What about? Here, you don’t want me as a cleaner, do you?’ she laughed.
    â€˜In a way.’
    â€˜Blooming cheek.’
    Mark began picking at the grass. He wasn’t looking at her. ‘Jan, I know this sounds daft but you see I didn’t know I’d miss you so much, and I’d like you to come and ... Oh, what the heck. Janet, will you marry me?’
    She stared at him. This wasn’t what she’d thought he was going say. She’d thought he might have suggested she go up to London for the weekend, but marriage ... He had never shown any real emotion towards her. They got on all right but only as friends. They only kissed as friends.
    â€˜I don’t know,’ she finally said.
    â€˜You do like me, don’t you?’
    She