The Ivy Lessons by J Lerman Page A

heart pounds . He puts a hand behind my head, and pulls me tighter against him, using his other hand to crush my body against his chest. Then , he l ets me go and we break apart.
    I stare at him, not knowing what to say or think. That kiss fe lt so real. N ot to Jennifer . To me. To Sophia. I felt he was kissing Sophia.
    I want him to do it again. Over and over again. And more. But he’s walking away, down the theatre steps .
    He turns and holds up his watch . ‘I have somewhere I need to be.’
    ‘Okay, ’ I venture.
    ‘It’s ...’ He waves his hands around. ‘ I hope this evening was helpful.’ He turns his back.
    ‘Will you help me again ?’ I ask, feeling like an idiot. Dazed by his kiss. A silly pupil with a crush on her teacher.
    ‘I don’t think you need any more help ,’ he says, walking away, and my stomach begins to churn.
    ‘What?’ I feel sick. ‘What do you mean?’ Is it my acting? Have I let him down? Or can he sense tha t I have a crush on him?
    He still has his back to me, but he stops walking. He sighs, and I see his musc ular shoulders move under his shirt. ‘ Perhaps one-on- one tuition like this ... it isn’t a very healthy dynamic.’
    ‘I don’t understand, ’ I say, aware there’s a slight pleading tone to my voice. ‘Have I done something wrong? If I ha ve, I’m sorry. Tell me and I won’t do it again ...’
    He turns around then, and his eyes burn into me. ‘But maybe I will. ’ H e strides down the aisle, and out of the theatre.
     

Chapter 25
    I sit on the stage, dumbfounded. I don’t understand what’s just gone on, but the sick feeli ng in my stomach makes me think I’ve just done something very stupid .
    H e will do what ? What does that mean? I know what I’d like to t hink he’d like to do , but h e’s a beautiful, intense, famous Hollywood actor, and I’m a twenty-something unknown from a small village.
    Suddenly, I’m on my feet, running down the aisle and out of the theatre.
    I see Marc walking across a trimmed lawn, the flutterin g of cigarette smoke floating from his hand.
    I run up to him.
    W hen he sees m e, a sad look creep s into his eyes.
    ‘I want to talk to y ou,’ I say . ‘I don’t know what just happened back the re. But ... I’m sorry. Tell me what I did. ’ I don’t want to cry, but I can feel the tears welling up.
    In a nearby tree, a few birds take flight.
    Marc looks even sadder. He closes his eyes and shakes his head. ‘ You didn’t do anything . I just ... I think I’ve taught you enough, now. I’ll see you at your next performance.’
    ‘But I haven’t learned nearly enough,’ I say. ‘Didn’t you see how much I improved, with just half hour of you teaching me? But I’m not there yet. There’s so much inside I want to bring out. I need you to help me -’
    Marc shakes his head. ‘It’s not a good idea.’
    ‘Why not?’
    ‘Don’t you get it Sophia? Don’t you understand? Do I have to spell it out?’
    I nod , confused.
    ‘ Back there ,’ he says, ‘ I might have ... I could have ... I’m usually so in control. But just then ... it isn’t healthy for me to be around you like that . N o t one-on- one . ’
    I twiddle my hair. ‘What do you mean? ’ My stomach is lurching all over the place. ‘I think ... I don’t want to guess at what you’re saying.’
    ‘I’m saying,’ says Marc, his voice practically growling , ‘that if I’m around you like that again, thing s might happen that cross the student teacher line. Am I making myself clear?’
    The sickly feeling rises to my chest. So that’s it. He knows I have a crush on him, and he thinks I might compromis e his status .
    ‘Look,’ I say, ‘I promise I’ll be profession al at all times. Yes – I was attr acted to you just now . I admit it. Probably half the girls on this course are attrac ted to you. But I understand what you’re saying. I’ll make sure I draw a firm line when I’m performing with you. Nothing that might compromise